


The Dusks and Shadows

by OneSkyOneDestiny127



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: M/M, Multi, TW: Self Harm
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-06
Updated: 2015-09-07
Packaged: 2018-04-07 22:52:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 37,373
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4280952
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OneSkyOneDestiny127/pseuds/OneSkyOneDestiny127
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Everything used to be so simple before that day. After that, though, everything went from easy going and carefree to difficult. Fate is fickle, but the brunette kept a smile on his face throughout it all, accepting everything it threw his way. Of course, not all fate is bad. Perhaps, it was destiny for things to end up the way it did. (SoRiku, Clack [Minor], unrequited SoKai)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> This is a prologue to the story! Disregard any grammar/misspells, I'm editing as I write.

"Sora, I'm hungry again." The small blonde haired boy spoke quietly, his hands pulling at the hem of his dirty shirt nervously. The blonde kept his blue gaze to just below his brother’s chin.

Similar blue eyes looked down at the little brother; a sad smile graced his lips. The sunset that gave Twilight Town its name was casting a faint glow on the soft features of Sora's brother, making him look almost like a frail angel. "Here, take my share," Sora replied, handing his small portion of the bread they had found earlier that day to the small hands. "I don't need it as much, Roxas, it’s okay." He tacked on the end with the worried glance he was given.

Roxas stared at the bread for a second before tearing off a small piece to eat. "When are you gonna go try to get another job?" He questioned, eyes on the food in his hands as temptation rose, but he knew better then to waste it all now.

Sora was silent. Hearing that question from his brother… hurt much more than he thought it would. The weeks that had gone by with the pair of them moving from street to street and scouring the area to and fro for food and a suitable shelter was becoming much more difficult. Not to mention, Roxas was a growing boy. He got hungry faster, his bones ached more than usual from the changes they were undergoing, and moving around so much didn't help him keep the little weight he had on.

On the other hand, Sora himself had dark bags under his eyes from keeping watch at night while Roxas slept, his own body growled in hunger from what little he ate since the majority of his food went to feeding Roxas, and the bruises that littered his arms and stomach from fighting with the other homeless people of Twilight Town to protect his small sunshine – mainly from the creeps and psychopaths – didn't help either.

Sora tried countless times to get a job, but him being so young and having little to no job experience made it difficult to actually become hired. He had set his sights on working for Moogle Synthesis, he could've collected materials, but they had told him it was much tougher then it seemed and was not suit for the job. The pay for collecting materials was great, which is the only reason he sought to work there.

Once his first job was declined, he tried to work at numerous different small shops on Market Street, and each one said he was either too inexperienced or too skinny to work. He had a feeling that the reason was more because of his gruff appearance; dirty brown spikes on his head, random blotches of dried blood on his clothes, and the way he smelled, even though Roxas and him were able to get a decent "bath" (consisting of simply rinsing off in the fountains, possibly washing off if they were lucky enough to find soap) every now and then.

The news such as that disheartened the man, but he would not give up. He had to get a job to take care of his little brother, no matter what.

"There's really only one more place left here. If it doesn't work out..." Sora paused, taking a deep breath. "We'll have to make our way to Radiant Garden and hope I can get a job there."

Roxas hummed quietly to let Sora know he heard. "How far away is Radiant Garden, if this last place doesn't hire you?" He plucked another small piece of bread off and plopped it in his mouth, doing his best to ration.

The older brunette idly played with a pebble on the ground that had chipped off the pavement, leaning back against the wall behind him. "Roughly 200 miles," He answered quietly, knowing that the distance was far too extreme on a long open road with little to nothing but a few gas stations planted every 60 or so miles. It would be too much for Roxas to handle.

A small noise came from the blonde, his eyes staring forward. "Well, that's not too bad, right?" He said, turning to stare into the similar blue eyes of Sora, "That's only, like, this big on a map." Roxas pinched the air between his fingers to show what he meant.

Sora grinned and laughed at Roxas's point, pulling the boy closer to hug him tightly. "You're right, it is only that big," He agreed, kissing the top of the blonde spikes before slightly nuzzling his face in them. Roxas smiled at Sora's laughter and cuddled into Sora's frame. "We could make it if we had to." Sora murmured into Roxas's hair.

They stayed in this position for a few minutes before Sora moved to stand. "We should move closer to where I'll be trying to get a new job, I don't want you too far from me," He explained and helped Roxas stand. "We could try and find some more food, too."

Roxas nodded as they shoved a few blankets, cans of soup, and extra clothes into the tattered backpack they had. Sora patted his back pocket to make sure the key shaped knife he had gotten from his father a few years back was still there. Once they had doubled checked and made sure they collected their belongings, they started their trek through alleys and back streets to get to their destination, making idle small talk.

A smaller hand made its way into Sora's hand, so as not to get too far apart. "I saw this really cute stuffed little Nobody some kid had at the park yesterday," Roxas informed, kicking a rock ahead of them to start a game.

The fact that Roxas was still a kid at heart always made Sora extremely happy, even though his random child tendencies were sometimes a bit much. "I was thinking about getting you a little nighttime buddy once I got a job."

Roxas's head turned up with a small pout on his lips. "But, you're my nighttime buddy! I don't want you to disappear either, not like my last nighttime buddy." A small frown crept onto his lips.

Sora's hand tightened around Roxas's at his words, hoping to distract the blonde from going too far into his memories on that subject. "I'm not going to disappear like that Rox, promise." He kicked the rock Roxas moved earlier to keep their game going.

"Alright, Sora," Roxas sighed quietly and lightly tapped the rock as they passed it. "Where's this job, anyway?"

Sora turned a corner and tugged Roxas along with him. "A few blocks away. I'll get you set up and hidden somewhere before I go try and get the job."

"I don't like the hiding game... It gets too hot sometimes," Roxas groaned. "Can't I just go with you?" His big blue eyes looked up at Sora with an almost puppy plead.

"No," A flat answer. It crushed Roxas's hopes as he turned his head down again. "I'm sorry, Roxas, but this job isn't one I want you to be seen at, alright?" With the sad nod that he was given, Sora leaned down and scooped Roxas up in his arms, holding him close to give him a big kiss on his cheek to make the boy smile again.  
It grew quiet as they continued their short journey down a couple more blocks to a particular street that was notorious for its gangs. "Alright, I'm going to hide you and I want you to stay very quiet and still til I come back," Sora ordered and set Roxas down on the ground, already beginning to take out the necessary items to hide the boy.

"Can you sing to me before you leave?" Roxas asked, helping Sora start covering himself up with the blankets.

Sora smiled slightly and pecked Roxas's forehead. "Of course I can, as long as you're quiet when I'm gone," With a confirmation nod, Sora continued, "Lemme guess, your favorite?" Another quick nod and a grin was added. The brunette cleared his throat and began softly singing.

"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine,  
You make me happy when skies are grey,  
You never know, dear, how much I love you,  
Please don't take my sunshine away,  
The other night, dear, as I lay sleeping,  
I dreamt I held you in my arms,  
When I awoke, dear, I was mistaken,  
So I hung my head, and I cried,  
You are my sunshine, my only sunshine,  
You make me happy when skies are grey,  
You never know, dear, how much I love you,  
Please don't take my sunshine away,"

Sora stopped singing just before he was done covering Roxas up. "Sorry, Sunshine, can't sing the whole thing. I really need to get going," With another light kiss to the blondes’ forehead, he covered the boy up. "Now stay quiet until I come back." He straightened up, checked Roxas's form to make sure he wasn't visible, and left the alley.

Streets like this in Twilight Town were near the outskirts. The shadows that were created from the large buildings closer to the inner city made these types of streets look more intimidating then they already do in the daytime. Homeless were common down here, the only place they can actually get free drugs from the cracks in the pavement.

There were constant battles between gangs and random acts of violence from the people too high or drunk to realize what they were doing. The place where he was heading for a job was safer, strange, but it was close to this danger.

Sora did not know how a strip club managed to stay so clean, since it was one of the most popular ones in Twilight Town.

He approached the still closed club - only a few hours to opening - and knocked on the door. The brunette hoped that the owner would be there early to start setting up, so he could possibly be hired today and start tonight. The sooner he got working, the better.

After more than ten minutes of him standing around outside the strip club, he was just about to give up and assume the owner wasn't there. Alas, just as he turned to walk away, the door was unlocked and opened to reveal a rather tall, muscular, long haired brunette with a large scar going from the top of his right eye diagonally down to the bottom of his left eye.

To say in the least, Sora was terrified of this man.

"H-hi," Sora stuttered out but quickly regained his composure. "I'm here to speak with the owner."

The older man looked Sora up and down with slightly narrowed eyes before stepping aside. "Then you would be speaking with me."

Sora gulped and stepped into the club, eyes darting around to familiarize himself with any other exit points in case this owner tried to kill him.

The decor consisted of dark purple wall paper and dark wood flooring. Booths were against the walls and a VIP lounge was towards the back where a lone pole was at to entertain the people who paid extra to have privacy. Small tables near the bar area had chairs stacked upside down atop them and the bar itself was spotless as well as completely stocked with many different types of alcohol. Speakers hung up in every corner of the large room but more were around the stage that held three poles, one out on the cat walk and two off to the side where back up pole dancers supported the main dancer. Spotlights - which were currently off - faced the stage, and lights lined the edges of the stage so the dancers avoided falling off the stage. A black curtain was drawn close, which Sora assumed led backstage where the strippers prepared for their performances. Overall, this place was very well done. It didn't even smell like puke or cigarettes, it smelt clean.

"What's your name?" The tall man asked, snapping Sora out of his gazing. He had completely forgotten to look for more exit points.

"Sora Hikari, sir," He replied, staring up at the man with a look of confidence and determination. He's made interviews his strong point, having been through so many in such a short period of time. "I'm here for a job. I know it's short notice but I could be very useful here." His tone was light yet assertive in a polite way, to further show his confidence.

Those light blue eyes the man had looked Sora up and down slowly, scrutinizing every aspect that was Sora's being. "How old are you?" Was all the man said after a few seconds.

"I just turned 17 last month,"

Blue eyes rolled in their sockets in annoyance, his arms moving to cross as he stared at the teen. "I can't hire a minor to work here, that'd be jail time for me and my business being shut down."

"I wouldn't tell anyone my age, I can lie and say I'm 18. I look 18 anyway, that means I'm not a minor, none of that would happen." Sora attempted to reason with the owner, his heart already feeling tight and constricted. His last hope could be ruined, just by his age.

A sigh escaped the man before him. "Sorry, kid. I can't hire minors. You should go home to your parents before they come looking for you and find you here."  
"They wouldn't come for me," Sora flatly said, his expression suddenly turning much more serious. "Please, sir, this is really my last hope, I need this job."

Sora could've sworn he saw the man's eyes soften just the tiniest amount at what he said. "As much as you could be a valuable member, I can't hi-"

"Hire minors, I get it," Sora cut him off, "I understand that it's against the law, that it probably scares you, but you have to understand that I need this job. I have a little brother, he needs proper food instead of having to ration what little I can afford, please!" His voice steadily rose in hysterics, the fact that he and Roxas may need to make a long journey to Radiant Garden making its appearance in his thoughts. Sora didn’t want to have to force Roxas all that way if it was the last thing he could do for his little brother.

When the owner had no reaction and kept staring at Sora, Sora's head turned down. Slowly, he sunk down to his knees, hands on the ground in an almost bowing respect. "Please, I have to get this job, I can't let my little brother suffer anymore, let him worry about things such as food." His eyes stayed focused on the ground. It was all he could do to not see the look on the owners face for this act of begging. He hoped bringing up the food situation wouldn’t give away the fact that the two siblings were homeless, but, the man didn’t say anything towards it.

"Get up," The man ordered, in which Sora obeyed hesitantly. There were minutes of silence, in which Sora kept thinking about how this was it, he had failed Roxas. Everything Sora tried so desperately to do was all for nothing because they would have to go to Radiant Garden after all or suffer on the streets for another year to get this job.

A sound of a sigh brought Sora back to the real world in an instant. "Fine, you can work here. Backstage, you can help the dancers get ready, but you will not be out in public."

Wide, blue eyes looked up at the owner – his boss. His mouth hung slightly open in pure shock. It took a good forty seconds for the news to settle in before he broke out in a large grin, happy tears streaming down his face almost immediately. He couldn’t believe this; his last resort was his sanctuary, and he couldn’t begin to think that maybe, just maybe, things would start picking up from here.

"Oh, thank you!" Sora yelled in his happiest tone, not bothering to stop himself from hugging his boss tightly. "Thank you, thank you so much, sir! You have no idea how much this helps me, us!"

Despite how tense the older man became, he didn't push Sora away. "Don't call me sir, my name is Squall Leonhart, but call me Leon." He informed and finally pried Sora off of him, only to see that Sora was still grinning like a maniac.

"Yes, si- Leon!" Sora gleefully said, wiping the tears off his cheeks. The overall happiness of actually obtaining a job was so overwhelming for Sora, he could barely contain himself. "When do I start?"

"Tonight, I suppose. Go clean yourself up, then be back by 9 to start backstage," Leon answered. "You'll enter through the back as well."

Sora nodded quickly, still brimming with joy. "Alright! I'll be here at 9 o'clock sharp!" He turned to leave, his lower half pushing the door open while his torso turned slightly to look at Leon. "Thank you so much again, you're a life saver, honestly." Sora grinned and waved as he left the club to return to Roxas and tell him the great news.

Who would've thought the answer to his prayers would be a strip club called The Dusks and Shadows?

\---

Sora's work at the club started out rocky; there were many times that he had sent the dancers out on stage with only half their make up on and or not the correct outfit for their routine on, but with the helpful hint from his co-worker, Naminé, he quickly adapted to the hectic life backstage.

Naminé is a rather quiet and petite blonde haired girl, but she helped Sora out when he needed it. Naminé easily became a good friend to Sora. The dancers also took an immediate liking towards Sora, due to his bright personality.

Just as the two makeup artists were setting up to start working on the talent, the sound of a motorcycle coming from the back was heard. The engine was shut off, and the dancers all sighed in an almost dreamy fashion.

"Looks like he's finally back!" Ariel, stage name The Little Mermaid, exclaimed excitedly.

"I can't believe he was gone for so long." Alice, also known as Wonderland, let out a huff with a cross of her arms.

"It's just because he knows Leon personally." Belle, correctly called Beauty, informed matter-of-factly to Alice.

"Ah, who cares? At least we can see him strip again!" A chorus of giggles erupted at what Jasmine, called Diamond in the Rough, said, but they quickly died down when a man with short, spiky blonde hair walked in.

Naminé reached out to Sora and grabbed his wrist lightly to pull him back up from his current digging through a chest full of extra clothing. "Sora," Her soft voice spoke, "You need to meet Cloud. Remember? He's the one I told you about, who went on that trip."

Sora straightened up and nodded to Naminé to show he remembered. His head turned to look at Cloud, eyes darting up and down the man. A well-built body, blue eyes, and a brooding, sullen stare to top it all off. Sora could swear he looked like an older version of Roxas, with less height on the spikes and less happiness.  
"Who are you?" Cloud asked, eyes finally landing on Sora after shrugging his jacket off his shoulders.

Putting on his infamous smile, he answered, "I'm Sora. You must be Cloud?" He took a few steps closer to Cloud, making sure to keep some feet between them.  
Cloud's eyes narrowed at the sight of Sora. "Yes, I am," Their eyes locked, and for a brief second, Cloud looked taken aback. "Why are you working here? Naminé is more than enough for makeup."

Although Cloud's tone suggested a rude remark, Sora's smile didn't fade or falter. "Well, I have my own things to pay for and Leon was nice enough to let me work here. Plus, Nam says it makes it easier for the dancers to get ready quicker."

"Leon..." Cloud breathed out. "It doesn't matter, she doesn't need you, and she can handle all this herself." Venom seeped into his sentence, making Sora tilt his head to the side in utter confusion. The brunet had no idea what he was doing wrong to Cloud.

"Leon seems to disagree with that, so, I'm here to stay," Sora retorted, smile still in place.

Cloud's eyes narrowed even more, a glare evolving from the stare. "Oh, so, you're here a few days and suddenly you know Leon best, is that it?"

"W-what?" Sora stuttered, eyes wide. "No, no! No, that's not what I meant at all! You see, I-"

"Save it, kid," Cloud cut him off, "I can already tell we will not get along, so stay out of my way if you know what’s good for you." He spat just before he turned and stormed off the backstage area through the side door.

Sora's mouth hung slightly open in complete shock. He didn't see what was wrong in trying to explain that the boss wanted him there to help Naminé, and because he was doing this for his little brother. Everyone who worked at a strip club had some deep reason to be there, what was so bad about him doing the same?

"I don't understand," Sora slowly said, staring at Naminé in disbelief. "Did I do something wrong?"

Naminé laughed softly behind her hand. "He's always like that with new people, albeit, I've never seen him that harsh before," She answered, tucking a strand of her blonde locks behind her ear. "Might be because him and Leon are best friends. I think you crossed a line, Sora."

Sora deadpanned and let out a groan. "How was I supposed to know that? I wasn't the one who came in here and gave him an angry look for no apparent reason."  
"That's just how he is," Naminé repeated, grabbing one of the makeup boxes. "I bet he'll warm up to you in no time."

Sora let out a hearty laugh as he helped Naminé get set up besides Ariel. "Oh, I'll believe it when I see it - in a million years."

Naminé smiled slightly at the joke, and began applying cover-up to Ariel's face. "He's not that cold-hearted. I mean, maybe he is a little, but not to _that_ extreme."

"It's fine, I just hope he doesn't get me fired," Sora sighed and handed Naminé the eye shadow. "I do like this job."

"Don't worry, Sora. Leon liked you, he's not going to fire you," Naminé reassured with a small smile on her lips.

Sora warily smiled back. "Alright, I believe you," He said, but there was still some worry that his blonde co-worker would make him walk on egg shells whilst he worked.

\---

Several months had passed since Sora and Cloud met. Their relationship only improved slightly, at least to where Cloud could carry on a conversation with the brunette without being a jackass – the majority of the time. Sora was determined to get Cloud to talk to him more, knowing that it'd be wise to be on the boss' best friend good side. And, Sora wanted to make sure he was on good terms with everyone in the workplace.

Currently, Sora and Roxas lived behind The Dusks and Shadows. Their small shelter was an alcove on the side of one of the other abandoned buildings behind the strip club, with planks of wood set up to act as an extra wall in the entrance to the alcove to protect them from the wind and hide them at night.

They did their best to stay away from directly behind the club at all costs, due to Leon and Cloud living above the club. Yes, Sora had found out the two best friends lived above the club and have been there since the club was first opened; well, Leon first.

"Ah, Sora!" Roxas yelled, snapping Sora out of his thinking and grabbing the brunette's attention. Sora's head whipped to the smaller boy in slight panic, only to calm back down when he saw that it was just a bloody nose that caused the yell.

"Don't scare me like that, Rox," Sora sighed and grabbed a napkin to hold it to Roxas's nose. "Keep that there and your head forward, you'll be okay." Sora reassured, though he couldn't help but wonder why Roxas suddenly got so many nose bleeds, but he knew it was more than likely from their living situation. That quenched his fear. Soon, they would be able to afford a small apartment... well, hopefully.

Sora saved as much money as he could, only buying food and water when they needed it, more blankets for the progressively colder nights, and a night at a motel every now and then when it was pouring outside. Sora also managed to afford new clothes here and there, especially new shoes for the both of them, and a few things for Roxas; a sketchbook, a Nobody stuffed Dusk, and colored pencils so the ten year old was preoccupied more. To say in the least, their lives were slowly, but surely, getting better.

Even Leon had become closer to the younger brunette, for he acted almost like an older brother. Most of the time, Leon made casual conversation with Sora, asking him personal and impersonal questions. But, mostly, Leon listened to a problem Sora may have (like if Roxas acted out), and Leon gave advice. It was wonderful for Sora to have someone to talk to about these things; he had felt truly alone for months with no one to turn to. Even if the support was minimal, Sora enjoyed having the older brunette care for him. Of course, it was probably only seen by Sora that way.

Leon had met Roxas after about a month of Sora working for him. Since Leon had known about Roxas from the start, he didn’t mind his boss knowing Roxas personally. Sora made sure that no one else knew about Roxas, however. He felt, even though everyone had become good friends of his, everyone did not need to know about his younger brother. It was more for safety reasons than anything else. More people knowing about Roxas could lead to trouble if one of his co-workers turned on him.

“Is it done?” Roxas questioned, taking the napkin away from his nose to examine the blood on it. Sora also turned his attention to it again, then to Roxas’s nose to see if it were still bleeding.

Sora turned Roxas’s head left, right, up, and down before concluding, “Yep, you’re all good. Do you feel light headed? Want some food?”

“No, I feel okay. But… can I have one of the cookies?” Roxas asked shyly, looking down at his hands which slowly went from open to closed.

Sora chuckled at the adorable act. Roxas had always been rather nervous about asking for food, even when they lived with their parents. It was always a mystery as to why Roxas was like that, but Sora assumed he’s always been a self-conscious kid, no matter how many times Sora told the blonde how cute and perfect he was. “Of course, let me get it,” Sora turned and grabbed the bag that held the majority of their food, only to freeze when he saw a pair of black boots standing directly in front of their hideout, since they had taken the planks of wood down for the day.

Wide, blue eyes darted up at the sight of the boots, the feeling of his heart skipping a beat in fear at the sight of his boss. “L-Leon!” Sora exclaimed, trying to cover up their living situation by shoving it behind himself and Roxas. “What are you doing here? Roxas and I were just walking around and we, um, we got tired, and so we stopped here.”

Those light blue eyes looked between Sora and Roxas, and then he slowly crossed his arms. “I didn’t picture you as a liar, Sora, especially when I’m standing in front of the truth.” Leon calmly spoke, his eyes never leaving those of the younger brunette’s.

“Oh, no, I’m not lying, I’m being honest! We walk everywhere so we bring food with us and sometimes Roxas gets cold so we have to bring blankets and extra clothes around with us, and a lot of the time we play games wherever we go so we have to bring our toys and such everywhe-“ Sora was cut off as Leon spoke again.

“You’re homeless,” Leon stated, gesturing to their tattered backpack and rather dirty appearance. “I figured something wasn’t right with where you lived when you first started working for me. You wore a lot of the same clothes and they weren’t the cleanest ones I’ve ever seen.”

Sora bit his lip and looked down at his indeed dirty clothes. He made them as clean as they could get for work, but he didn’t have proper laundry detergent to actually get out the stains. Even if the clothes were brand new, they easily became dirty just from the constant walking around that the two did. Perhaps it was his own fault for never considering that Leon – or Cloud – might find their make shift home so close to the club.

Either way, Sora was terrified that this little incident would land them back on the streets with no income.

“I’m trying to get an apartment, I really am, and it’s just…” Sora trailed off, twiddling his thumbs idly as he thought out what to say to try and reason with Leon’s good side, “Everything is way more expensive then I can afford with your paychecks, and I’d rather save and get us the things we need when we need it then have nothing in an apartment.”

Leon didn’t have much of a reaction to that. “What your little brother needs is a stable home. Moving around so much isn’t good for anyone, and I bet he’s not in school either, when he should be. You should have prioritized a home for him, getting him an education and a social life, much like you should be doing.”

What Leon said made Sora’s heart twist painfully. It was true that Roxas was a ten year old who wasn’t in school but there was little to nothing he could do about it. The fact that Leon would blame Sora for not having a home for Roxas hurt just as much; Sora did everything he could to keep Roxas safe and fed and warm, even if there was no roof there to protect them. There were certain necessities that came before others, and Sora would get Roxas back into school as soon as possible. He wanted Roxas to get a proper education to never have to go through something like this.

“I… I know,” Sora spoke softly, head turned downwards to avoid his bosses’ stare. “I’m trying my best with what I have, even if that means that Roxas isn’t in school. I teach him what I know and raise him right. Once we have a place to live I’ll get him back in school, and he’ll be the smartest kid there.”

Roxas grew closer to Sora at the comment, his smaller hand slipping into that of his older brothers, giving it a comforting squeeze to let Sora know that he was okay with their living situation, that he didn’t mind much being patient, which caused Sora to smile. That simple act was enough for Leon to see just how close the two were, even in these circumstances.

“You’re trying to get a roof over your heads, correct?” Leon questioned, finally losing his boss like demeanor to be replaced with a more open look.

“Of course, it’s on my priority list, even though it’s not first on there.” Sora answered, using Roxas’s comfort to stare into his bosses’ eyes again.

Leon made a quiet “Hmpf,” at the back of his throat and jerked his head towards the club. “Grab your things and come inside.” He ordered before walking back towards his establishment. Sora and Roxas both gave each other a rather confused stare, but gathered their belongings anyway. Once they had double and triple checked their alcove for any stray items, they followed Leon into the strip club.

Sora instinctively covered Roxas’s eyes as they entered, not wanting Roxas to see the many different revealing outfits and fish net stockings and feathered boas lying strewn about almost everywhere around the backstage area. The brunet made a mental note to have him and Naminé clean up the mess before the dancers got there that night.

Leon waved a hand in the air to let Sora know to keep following him. With his hand on Roxas’s shoulder to help lead him, they followed the man. Sora assumed they were going to go into Leon’s office to talk about this little problem and most likely get fired, but when they passed said office, Sora grew very skeptical and a tad scared. Was Leon bringing them somewhere he could kill them? No, Leon wasn’t like that… or was he? Maybe he’s taking them to Cloud, so Cloud could do the dirty work while he sits back and hides the bodies. Or, maybe Leon just wanted an even more private area to fire him. Either way, Sora was nervous. More so for Roxas than himself.

They were led upstairs, down a hallway, and into a rather cozy living room. There was a couch centered in the middle of the room, a small wood coffee table in front of it, and two chairs on opposite sides of the coffee table facing diagonally towards a plasma TV that hung on the wall. Bookcases lined the walls that weren’t already occupied by blank space. The amount of different books was phenomenal, and Sora could make out the literature Leon had, which consisted mostly of famous plays, well-known bestsellers, and many writings on history and mythology. One hallway branched off this one space, and a window like structure was cut out to create a small bar with the kitchen on the other side of it. One other room connected from the living room which led to a rather abandoned looking dining room, and down the hallway were three shut doors, with an additional doorway that led to the kitchen. Overall, this house above the strip club seemed welcoming, despite the consistent noise of the street directly outside the windows, which put the place in perspective.

And then it hit Sora that they were standing in Leon’s and Cloud’s house. “Um, Leon, why are we here? I don’t think Cloud really likes me and this is his house too and he doesn’t exactly know about Roxas,” Sora explained, but more so rambled, his reason for not being entirely comfortable standing here in the middle of the living room.

“He’ll have to learn to like you,” Leon said and looked at Sora with a serious gaze, “because you two will be living here from now on.”

Sora stared at Leon, as did Roxas. Of course, Sora was the only one to say something – after a good minute or so of shocked silence. “What? You can’t be serious. You’re joking, right? There’s no way you’d say something like that, don’t you have some policy that the people who work for you can’t live with you?”

“Cloud works for me and he’s lived here since he started,” Leon countered easily, stepping back to lean against the wall with his arms crossed.

Sora stuttered and began going off on a list of reasons as to why this couldn’t be real or why this couldn’t be happening. “But, you know Cloud so much better than me, and I probably couldn’t afford rent here, and this can’t be happening because you’re my boss! I mean, this just doesn’t make sense as to why my _boss_ would let me _and_ my brother live here with no strings attached, that’s just too weird! Right? Something’s up, something has to be up, nothing this good comes our way without a penalty. It’s some sort of blackmail, right? Am I doing that bad of a job that you’d need to do that? ‘Cause I can do better, I can-“

“Sora!” Leon yelled to stop the brunet from going on any further. “Calm down, take a deep breath and let me explain.”

Sora pouted but took a deep breath nonetheless. “But-“

“No,” Leon cut off once more, giving Sora a second to see if he’d protest again. “I am letting you live here in exchange for a small rent fee. You and Roxas are welcomed here because I see how hard you work every night and I am aware now that you were doing it to keep Roxas healthy and happy. The fact that you did so much for him and put yourself aside at a young age is remarkable. Teenagers are rarely this selfless nowadays. I want to help you have a home, so Roxas can go back to school and you can sleep easy at night, have an actual shower and meals, and not worry about strangers attacking either of you when you sleep. Is that clear enough? I am not doing this out of pity for you two either.”

Sora’s mouth gaped open the entire time Leon spoke and his hand tightened on Roxas’s shoulder to stop him from falling over in shock. The fact that Leon, who put on such a seemingly cold appearance, would offer something like this to them was so unbelievably generous. Knowing that Leon didn’t even expect a large rent made everything better. That meant his paychecks could be saved tenfold; he could start giving Roxas birthday parties and gifts, Roxas would get back into school, they could go on a real shopping trip and buy a whole new wardrobe and keep their clothes clean as well as themselves, everything the two had missed since they became vagabonds in Twilight Town.

It seemed like they could see their silver lining and it was finally in arms reach.

Leon remained standing in front of Sora for a good four minutes before the younger brunette spoke up again. “Thank you,” He whispered first, then said loud and clear, “Thank you so much, Leon!” Sora didn’t have the will power to stop himself from hugging Leon even tighter then when he was given the job. This one person had already given Sora a job, and now a home too. Sora felt extremely grateful towards Leon in every way possible.

“You’re welcome,” Leon responded as he hugged Sora back. It took another second or so for Roxas to join in on the hug as well. He didn’t say anything, but the hug from the ten year old said enough of what he felt.

Sora was laughing giddily as he stepped back from Leon and picked Roxas up instead, holding his little brother close. “Everything is working out again, Roxas. We’ll be okay now,” The smile on Sora’s face was one that gave his blue eyes a new light. Just the sheer force of that one smile made Roxas grin and nod, his thin arms wrapping around Sora’s neck to hug him.

Just as Sora was about to thank Leon again and say how much this meant to him, Cloud came walking out of one of the doors down the right hall. He was about to turn into the kitchen when he noticed Sora and Roxas – but to him it looked like Sora and some random child in his living room. “Sora? What are you doing up here?” His blue eyes went from a questioning stare at Sora to Leon. “The Hell is going on here?”

Leon sighed and gestured to Roxas. “No swearing, Cloud. There’s a child present,” Cloud looked annoyed for being told to change just because of Roxas, but he waited for Leon to elaborate on what was going on. “And they’re moving in.”

Cloud froze for a split second before quickly rebounding. “Excuse me? Some worker and a random kid? That doesn’t make any sense, I don’t want them living here,” Cloud spat, making Sora hold tighter onto Roxas in case the older blonde just so happened to attack.

“That’s not your choice. As much as your opinion matters to me, I’m the owner either way. What I say goes, and if you don’t like it, you can leave.” Leon calmly said, barely batting an eye at Cloud’s shocked face.

“I’ve lived here longer than those two; I’ve _known_ you longer than those two! Don’t act like that Leon, you know I hate it when you use the ‘I’m the owner’ card. It’s incredibly infuriating.” Cloud retorted instantly.

Leon shrugged. “Well, I believe you need to get used to having Sora around. He will be living with us from now on, as well as his little brother, Roxas. I do have to ask you not to tell any of the other performers about Roxas, Sora doesn’t want anyone else to know. Can I trust you to keep quiet about it?”

With Leon’s calm attitude, it seemed to stop Cloud from blowing up completely. But, of course, the blond wouldn’t go down without a fight. “Why does he have to move in? What makes him so special, hm?”

“Because they need a place to stay. He is one of my hard working employees, and I will give him a house if that is what is needed,”

“That doesn’t explain what makes him so special,”

“And how does it not?”

“You don’t just open your home to anyone,”

“I can open my house to anyone I deem deserves to be in my house,”

“The fuck type of answer is that?”

Sora covered Roxas’s ears at that point, trying to stay quiet while also deter the argument between the two men. “Hey, you guys, I-“

“They deserve to live here, Sora cares for his little brother,”

“And I care for Fenrir, but you don’t see me bringing her up here,”

“Stop referring to your motorcycle as a human, it can get rather confusing sometimes,”

“Oh, don’t change the subject idiot. I don’t want them living here, it’ll just be more crowded and loud, especially because Sora is naturally loud,”

“Hey! I mean, I’m loud but I can be quiet!” Sora interjected with a defensive brow furrow.

“Sora, be quiet, this is between Cloud and I,” Leon silenced.

“Yeah, shut up loud mouth,” A smack echoed with the hit to the back of Cloud’s head from Leon. “Hey!”

“Don’t be a child, I thought you were past this. And they’re staying, end of story, stop arguing with me,”

“But, Leon-“

“No,”

“Will you just-“

“ _No_ ,”

Cloud groaned loudly. “Okay! Fine! I’ll deal with it, whatever. Who’s the kid again?” Cloud’s narrowed eyes landed on Roxas, boring daggers into the younger blonde’s quickly averted gaze.

“He’s my little brother,” Sora answered slowly, removing his hands from Roxas’s ears to place them on his shoulders instead. “Roxas, meet Cloud, Cloud, this is Roxas.” Roxas shyly waved, and surprisingly, Cloud gave a small wave back. “He’s only ten, but he’s a good kid. He shouldn’t be much of a bother to you, Cloud. And I’ll stay out of your way too.”

Cloud stayed silent for a minute or two before sighing in defeat. “No, you don’t have to. Don’t be too loud and don’t bother me 24/7. I’ll tolerate you both, but don’t expect me to help with your problems or be your friend. Got it?”

“Yes, sir!” Sora gave a slight salute as Cloud rolled his eyes and turned to Leon again.

“You’ll regret having them here sooner or later, and you know exactly why I don’t want them here,” He said quietly to Leon, who gave him a grunt in response. “Stay out of my room.” Was the last thing he said to the pair as he walked back down the hall and into his room.

Sora and Roxas were silent in a more if-I-talk-Cloud-might-kill-me sort of way. Very, very quietly, Roxas whispered, “Why’s he so angry at us?”

Sora shrugged and just shook his head. Whatever relationship he was building with the blonde was most certainly ruined by the new living situation. Well, time to start from scratch and make a new bond. And it was already clear that that would be virtually impossible.

“Come with me, I’ll show you two your room,” Leon spoke up, walking towards the dining room. “The kitchen is the first door on the right down the hall, and the first door on the left is the bathroom, but there’s only one so you’ll have to share that with the rest of us. Unfortunately, this house doesn’t come equipped with four bedrooms, so it will be a project that we’ll have to work on to convert the dining room into your room.” Leon gestured into the quasi spacious dining room, which seemed very unused and rather dark.

Sora nodded and smiled. “This is more than enough for us.” He spoke and looked at Leon.

“I’ll have to take down the table, but we have an air mattress you two can sleep on for the time being. We can start working on converting this room tomorrow,” Leon informed and Sora once again nodded. The feeling of a thousand pounds being lifted off his shoulders felt incredibly amazing. The stress he had had for so long was finally diminishing with just the simple act of his boss giving him a roof over their heads. This was the break he needed; to be able to start actually providing for Roxas even if they weren’t living by themselves.

He was more than excited to officially restart their lives.

The brothers grabbed their belongings and set them up against the dining room wall, Sora helping Leon deconstruct the old dining room table while Roxas took a much needed shower. With it being just him and Leon, Sora decided this was a perfect time to start talking to Leon about this; thanking him.

“I can’t thank you enough, Leon. This is truly an amazing thing you’ve done for me and Roxas,” Sora thanked with a smile on his face, a very genuine one that meant he was truly and utterly grateful. “You’ve done so much for me and him.”

Leon’s lips turned up just slightly. “You’re welcome. Don’t make me regret this, alright? I may have given Cloud a hard time earlier but if you mess up this opportunity I will kick you both out, against my morals.”

“Y-yes, sir. I won’t mess up; I’ll make sure to not bother either of you. Roxas should be really quiet too, he’s a shy kid anyway,” Sora explained with a small sigh. Maybe living here with two new people would help Roxas get out of his shell and talk more, especially with him getting to go to a new school soon. “I hope we don’t make Cloud too mad, he seems like the type to beat up his roommates.”

“He’ll be fine as long as you’re both quiet. Cloud has his reasons for not liking you, but I have a feeling he’ll come around,” Leon informed, “You’re a good kid, Sora. So is Roxas. Just focus on settling in for now and when Cloud gets to know you his attitude will change.”

Sora nodded once in response. “I hope so.” Sora stood, helping Leon begin taking the dining room table downstairs to the dumpster, where Leon gladly threw it out. Apparently, the thing had been bothering Leon for years but he had no reason to actually get rid of it.

Once the table was gone, Leon got the air mattress and fresh, clean sheets to put on it. “There’s a laundry machine in the closet beside here, go ahead and clean your clothes and Roxas’s.” Leon pointed out as he opened the closet directly next to the dining room. Sora gratefully used the washing machine, finally cleaning the clothes that had had these stains and strange smells for weeks.

“Would it be alright if I cooked dinner for you, Cloud, and Roxas tonight?” Sora asked just as Leon turned to walk back to the living room. “I learned how to cook from my mother, and, well, I’d love to somehow repay you, even if it’s with your own food.” Sora said sheepishly, rubbing the back of his head when Leon gave a surprised look.

“Go right ahead. Cloud usually cooks but I doubt he’d mind not cooking tonight,” Leon responded and finished his walk to the living room. Sora was quite the excellent cook in the kitchen. Everything he knew, he learned from his mother, and he’d never forget those cooking skills. He loved being able to cook; it was one of the few things he was good at. Whenever he did cook, it reminded him of the simpler times, back when it used to be just the five of them.

Sora shook his head from the thoughts and quickly distracted himself by going to check on Roxas, who had been taking a shower since they started destroying the dining table. He lightly knocked on the door before entering, “Hey, Rox, I need a shower, too.” Sora said with a joking voice. He shut the door behind him and laughed when Roxas groaned from behind the dark shower curtain.

“But the water is so _warm_! I want to live in here.” Roxas happily said, but shut the water off anyway. The brothers had no problems seeing each other naked; being homeless for so long meant they’d have to see each other naked at some point, so it just stopped bothering them.

Sora handed Roxas a towel he found (after searching underneath the sink and in the small cabinets in the bathroom) and helped him dry off. “Our clothes are still being washed, so you’ll have to re-wear these, alright?” Sora informed Roxas, pointing at the still dirty clothes. Roxas nodded and silently got dressed again, before looking awkwardly between Sora and the door. “You know Leon. He won’t bite. But, you can stay in here if you want.” Sora offered, though he wanted Roxas to get to know Leon better, and have a quiet shower to himself.

Roxas bit his lip before shaking his head. “I-I’ll go sit with Leon,” Roxas said slowly, quietly. Sora grinned, kissed the top of Roxas’s head, and let the younger boy leave the bathroom before he eagerly stripped and got in the shower. All he could think of once the water hit his bare, dirty skin was, _Damn, did I miss warm water._

After about a half hour, Sora came out of the bathroom, dressed in his old clothes as well, and was met with a shocking sight. It looked like Cloud – he knew it was Cloud because Leon wouldn’t have video games – had brought out a PlayStation 3, letting Roxas and Leon play a simple multiplayer game. The sight brought a grin to Sora’s lips, and he gleefully took the controller from Leon in order to battle Roxas instead, but he let his brother win either way. That grin stayed on his lips the entire night, and it never once faded, not even when Cloud was being a sarcastic asshole again.

Everything he had hoped he could give Roxas was given to him, and he felt as if this was going to be their new family, even with the brooding Cloud in it. Everything would be perfect from now on, progressively getting better, never worse.

Sora wished he knew how wrong he was.


	2. Chapter 1

-Several years later-

Sora was currently putting make-up on Alice, who was to go on next with Ariel. The dull roar of the crowd beyond the black curtains was progressively getting louder as the performance was about to begin, but backstage had its own excited chattering from the dancers and make-up artists, and, of course, the excited squealing coming from Ariel who was talking to Roxas. The smell of alcohol and distant smoke was wafting in slowly but it quickly dissipated in the fans and air filters.

The years that passed allowed Sora to become much better with applying make-up, correctly combining an outfit for the dancers, and for him to get closer to all the people he worked with. Naminé still taught and helped Sora whenever he needed it, and the two of them had become very good friends. The two brothers still lived with Cloud and Leon, and Sora had saved up a nice amount of munny, but he had no need to ask to be a stripper. He was content being a backstage artist.

Both his and Roxas’s lives had been getting better, which was a great relief for the two of them. Roxas had enrolled in school again and was getting amazing grades, which thoroughly impressed Sora and made Sora feel very proud of the blonde. Despite them being homeless for a year, Roxas still kept his genius and proved himself every day at school. It gave a sense of accomplishment and hope towards Roxas, like he’d actually done things right for him.

With their lives on a brand new track, Sora had begun looking for someone to call his boyfriend. He knew he was gay, that much was easy for him to tell, but he had never been in a relationship. Never found someone he wanted to be in a relationship with, to be correct. That didn’t bother him much, but he was almost twenty, and that meant he should start looking for someone to be intimate with. Maybe not forever, but at least as an intro-to-dating type of boyfriend.

Sora tuned his attention back to the conversation nearest him, and laughed at a sarcastic joke Jasmine made to Alice, something about how Alice was too short to ride the Thunder train (aka, Cloud), and Sora doubled over with laughter, effectively smearing the lipstick he was applying to Alice.

“Sorry, sorry,” He quickly waved off, grabbing a wet towel to wipe the red smudge off, “But I can’t take a joke like that seriously, especially with your face, Alice.” Sora pointed out and laughed again as the blonde girl made an angry pout. It was about that time that Jasmine went on stage, along with Belle, leaving Alice and Ariel backstage to continue getting ready. Sora then decided to listen in on what Ariel was talking to his brother about.

“Oh, and then what, cutie?” Ariel asked the blonde, a look of enthusiasm on her face.

Roxas smiled shyly, his legs kicking slowly from the stool he sat on. “Well, then, my teacher handed out the math test but I wasn’t really ready for it, cause I don’t like algebra, and then-“

“Rox, can you hand me the eye shadow?” Sora interrupted, snapping the blonde’s attention back to his job of being a helper to Sora. His blue eyes searched for the eye shadow, and he handed it to his older brother when he found it. “Thanks, love.” Sora grinned at Roxas before beginning to apply the eye shadow to Alice.

Roxas had begun sitting with Sora backstage every night because he didn’t like being alone upstairs, and the dancers adored him. Besides, it gave Roxas something to do once he was done with his homework, which he got through extremely fast every day. Roxas also got an allowance for helping Sora. The setting wasn’t normal for a thirteen, almost fourteen, year old boy to be subjected too, but Roxas was quite mature for his age, and Sora believed he’d be fine if he was just backstage. It’s not like he saw the dancers strip.

“Anyway, I took the test and ended up with the best score of the class!” Roxas finished his story and giggled when Ariel made an excited noise for the blonde and hugged him tightly.

“You’re such a smarty, Roxas! I swear, you could go so far with your brain,” Ariel exclaimed, only letting slightly go when Cloud walked into the backstage area, her arm still around the smaller blonde.

Sora glanced at Cloud for a second but was re-focused on applying Alice’s make-up to say anything. Cloud stepped over to Roxas and Ariel, his arms crossed. “You think he can go far?” Cloud questioned, normal brooding face in place, “Because I think he could go further than far with how smart he is.” Cloud smiled ever so slightly as he ruffled Roxas’s hair and placed a light kiss on Roxas’s head.

The younger blonde smiled hugely up at Cloud at the compliment. “Thanks,” He said, his blue eyes dancing with happiness. Cloud compliments were rare – for everyone except Roxas. It seemed that Cloud had become very close to Roxas, and Sora loved that. Cloud was the one Roxas went to for school work help (Sora was never the best at learning in the first place), and Cloud was always willing to help Roxas. It brought a smile to Sora’s face; especially since Cloud was naturally seemingly cold and heartless, and for him to be so sweet to Roxas was something to behold.

“Here, I got you something,” Cloud spoke, pulling out a Hershey’s candy bar from his back pocket. “You need some weight on you anyway; are you sure you’re not working out?” He handed Roxas the chocolate, which the younger blonde gladly took. Roxas had been losing a plethora, for a child of his age, amount of weight – 33 pounds to be exact – the past few months, and it was something that Sora worried about but not too much. He assumed Roxas was going through another growth spurt and just needed plenty of food.

“No, I don’t like working out. It gets me all sweaty,” Roxas complained with a small pout on his lips. He almost eagerly tore into the candy bar, but he quickly froze when he saw Sora staring at him with a look of complete shock. “U-um, may I have it, Sora? I ate all my dinner!” He pleaded, giving his older brother his best puppy eyes.

Sora let out a chuckle. “Just wanted you to ask instead of assume you could have it. But, yes, go ahead. Thanks, Cloud,” Sora smiled brightly at the eldest blonde, who responded by ruffling the brunette spikes.

“I don’t need a ‘thanks’ for trying to fatten up the twig over there,” Cloud smirked at Roxas’s gaping mouth, which caused Alice and Ariel to “Aww,” loudly.  
“Roxas, baby!” Ariel cried, her arms around Roxas once more.

“You’re not that much of a twig!” Alice added.

“Don’t listen to Cloud, he’s just upset that he’s not that skinny,” Naminé said softly, ignoring the astonished look Cloud gave her.

“Yeah, you’re just a perfect little kid,” Alice smiled at the blonde as she hopped out of the chair in front of Sora and wandered over to the clothes rack to grab her outfit for the night – appropriately designed to resemble a school girl since the theme that night was common fetishes.

“Wow, don’t you girls think Roxas is gonna grow up with a big ego with all of you spoiling him with compliments?” Sora asked, laughing. “But I can’t deny he is perfect.” Sora grinned at his younger brother, earning an embarrassed blush from him, but it quickly was replaced by another expression.

Roxas had a rather smug look on his face as he turned his nose up to Cloud. “See, it doesn’t matter my size, I’m perfect, big brother,” Roxas’s eyes widened at what he said, including the eyes of everyone currently backstage. “I-I didn’t mean that, Cloud! Sorry!” Roxas’s head quickly turned down, the tips of his ears red in complete and utter chagrin. The past three years that they’ve all been living together, Roxas had never considered anyone his brother except for his actual brother, and even then, he rarely called Sora “big brother,” much to the brunette’s dismay. He couldn’t deny that calling an older brother “big brother,” was adorable.  
Cloud was currently staring blankly at Roxas, but he soon rolled his eyes. “About time you accepted me, little brother,” It was partially expected that Cloud would respond positively, but the older blonde was so unpredictable that it could’ve gone either way. But, his response made everyone backstage grin, especially Sora.

“Aww! Cloud! You’re becoming such a softie!” Sora exclaimed, pointing to the right outfit Ariel was supposed to wear. He laughed at the cold look that was given to him by Cloud in response to the statement. “Don’t give me that look when you know I’m right.”

Cloud scoffed and stepped over to the clothes rack, pulling his outfit out to give it a once over. “You’re not right, you’re never right.”

“Excuse me? I’m more right than you!” Sora countered and sat down in the now unoccupied chair for a much needed rest. “Well, when it comes to you and Roxas, at least.”

Cloud rolled his eyes, about to reject Sora’s statement when Roxas began swaying slightly on the stool he was sitting on. This instantly alerted Sora. “Hey, Rox, you feeling alright? What’s wrong?” He stood and took a step towards Roxas, putting a hand on his shoulder to steady him.

“I… dunsht-“ Roxas muttered before his eyes fluttered shut and he fell completely forward. Sora’s arms were quick to go around him, and panic flowed into his body instantly, his heart beating a million beats per minute.

“Roxas! Roxas, are you okay?” He near shouted out of fright, lightly shaking his little brother. “Hey, can you hear me? Come on, answer me!” When there was no response, he muttered under his breath, “Shit…”

Sora’s head swarmed with the possibilities of what was wrong. Sora had thought the weight loss was nothing but growth, but now that Roxas passed out, he had no idea what was wrong with his little brother. He felt like he’d done so many things wrong instantly, nothing right, and he vowed immediately to do everything in his power to make things right. Everything seemed to crash down in Sora’s head, making his body shake in fear. Being homeless for so long had to have done something to Roxas’s immune system, he could’ve caught something from the water they drank and it finally took action a few months ago and began eating away at Roxas. Everything Sora had done to protect his little brother had to be for naught, because whatever was wrong with Roxas had to be his fault.

Just like that day they left their house for the afternoon.

There was an almost instant circle formed around Sora and Roxas, made of Alice and Ariel, asking questions such as, “Is he okay?” and “What happened?” None of them had answers, and that only increased the fear that was bubbling inside of Sora; not that he expected them to know, but he wished someone knew something. Naminé had quickly stood beside Sora to look at Roxas, and the sympathetic look she gave the brunette made his mind go blank with absolute concern for his younger brother. He knew something was wrong, but he wanted someone to reassure him, even if it was a flat lie.

“Cloud! Cloud, tell Leon I’m taking Roxas to the hospital!” Sora yelled over the girls as he picked Roxas up, holding the limp boy close to his chest. He only briefly saw Cloud nod in confirmation to his demand before he was rushing out of the club through the backdoor, unlocked his worn down and used blue jeep, and buckled Roxas into the passenger seat.

“You’re going to be okay,” Sora whispered and lightly pressed his lips to Roxas’s forehead, though he couldn’t stop the quiver in his voice as he looked at the pale blonde.

_This is all your fault. You’ll lose him too._

Sora made haste of getting into the car and driving to the hospital – going faster than the speed limit and he prayed that a police car wouldn’t pull him over. His heart was racing, he could barely think of anything else except how he did something to Roxas. It was him who brought them away from the foster home, it was him who sought a better life in Twilight Town, it was him who let Roxas drink and eat things a ten year old shouldn’t be drinking or eating. Now, they were both paying the price.

It was hard for Sora to think that anything trivial could be wrong with Roxas. Only the worst thoughts came and went, putting more and more fear into the brunette. Not: maybe he was too tired, or maybe he had a bad headache, or maybe it was just a bad case of a cold. People pass out for all sorts of reasons, right?  
But, not all of them lose 33 pounds in less than three months, or bruise easily, or are tired all the time.

Sora quickly shook his head at the thought that crept up after that fact. No, it couldn’t be that severe.

He arrived at the hospital in record time. His parking job was wretched, but he didn’t care enough to fix it before he was hopping out of the car and grabbing Roxas again. He checked to make sure Roxas was still breathing as he ran into the hospital.

His feet led him to the nurses’ station in a hurry, as he yelled, “Help, my little brother – he collapsed!” Panic was obvious in his voice, eyes, and body language.  
The nurse flinched slightly as she looked at Sora, then at Roxas. “What happened?” She asked, tapping a nurse near her to tell him to get the boy to a room.  
“He just collapsed! He was fine just before that- help him! He needs help!” Sora shouted again, the boy heavy in his arms and Sora shifted his weight.

“Sir, I need you to take a deep breath and calm down,” The nurse calmly spoke, just as a few of the nurses came by with a gurney. “Just let us take your little brother to a room so he can be examined.”

Sora, as hesitant as he could be, handed Roxas to the nurses who set him on the gurney. As soon as Roxas was being wheeled away, Sora tried to follow, only to be stopped by the nurse behind the counter grabbing his arm. “I have to go with him,” Sora almost whined, his voice on the brink of cracking and his eyes close to welling with tears he knew wanted to spill over his bottom eye lids. “I have to be there when he wakes up, he needs me there.”

“I’m sorry sir,” The nurse spoke softly, sympathy in her eyes. “I’ll need you to fill out a report while he’s being checked out, and you’ll need to stay here until the doctor comes to get you.”

“No, I am _not_ waiting for the doctor to come get me! I am going back there with my brother and waiting for him to wake up with me beside him!” Sora yelled, sadness easily being replaced with an adrenaline-anger. He needed to go back with Roxas. He was incredibly afraid of losing him, of Roxas not waking up, or of Roxas waking up and him not being beside the blonde.

The nurse lightly shook her head and pushed Sora gently towards the waiting room. “You have to fill the paper work out, and then when the doctor comes to get you, you can go see your brother. I know it’s hard but-“

“Don’t ‘but’ me! I am not about to leave him alone in this hospital! I don’t care how safe this place is, I will not leave him alone for a split second!” Sora shouted before again trying to walk towards the glass doors Roxas had been wheeled into, the caveat of “Authorized personnel and family past this point,” flashing into his face in bright red. “I _am_ family! I have every right to be with him now! I’ll fill out this stupid form in the room with him!”

Blue eyes of the nurse hardened and she stood between Sora and the door. “If you do try to get back there, sir, you won’t be allowed in his room once the doctor says he’s ready for visitors. I suggest you go sit down and take a few deep breaths.” She sternly, yet softly, spoke. Her calm nature and attitude forced Sora to rethink his current actions, and he took a few deep breaths.

Sora wanted to reason with her anyway, convince her to let him go back there with his puppy dog eyes, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it. The adrenaline rush that was there a second ago was gone like snow on a hot pavement. His mind was finally wrapping around the fact that something had happened to Roxas, and that could’ve been it. He wouldn’t have his little brother anymore.

All he wanted to do was sit down and stop thinking.

He took the clipboard from the nurse which held a sheet of paper to be filled out about the patient. He walked slowly over to the chairs set up in the hospital waiting room, and sat down, ignoring the looks of confusion, fear, and pity from the other people in the room who had seen the whole thing go down. As his mind calmed, the smell of antiseptics and powerful cleaning agents hit his nose like a truck, making him scrunch his nose slightly in distaste. His mind seemed to be completely shut down now, his head void of any thoughts except for the ones that concerned the sheet of papers questions.

_Patient’s name: Roxas Hikari_   
_Age: 13_   
_Cause for coming to the hospital: Fainted suddenly_

It didn’t take him long to fill out the sheet, and then he was just sitting there. He was still; facial expressions not giving off how he feels. It seemed like he was sitting there for hours, days even, when in reality, it was about twenty minutes. At that time, Leon and Cloud showed up. Cloud had gotten changed into normal clothes to go to the hospital, and both of them made their way to Sora.

“Sora?” Leon asked, his hand on Sora’s shoulder to lightly shake him after the man did not respond to his name the first three times. “How is he?”

Sora’s eyes locked onto Leon’s after a second, his mouth open slightly. He was shocked about what was happening with Roxas, but the fact that Leon and Cloud both came here was incredibly unbelievable. It was true that the two had become very close to Sora and Roxas, but Sora never expected them to come to the hospital if one of them was in it. He loved the two older men like his own family, but, still, he couldn’t believe they’d drop work to come there as well.

“Why are you here?” Was all Sora could ask, his eyes going between Leon and Cloud. “You didn’t have to come; I can handle it here.”

Cloud rolled his eyes and smacked the back of Sora’s head. “You’re an idiot, you know that?” He said in a slightly venomous tone but it softened almost immediately. “You two are like family, why wouldn’t we come?”

Sora stared blankly at Cloud and rubbed the back of his head. “Family? You… consider us family?” Sora questioned, his heart seeming to lift at the notion. The thought of having a real family again, no matter how strange, was something he longed for since that afternoon three years ago. Wanting somewhere to call home and be welcomed every day, be loved even if those words never passed their lips, was a dream that seemed so unattainable or far away that he never saw this coming, even if the first two things on his list were already accomplished by the two older males.

“Of course,” Leon answered, cold look still in place but his eyes read a different story. “Now, how is he?”

Sora took a second to answer, his head now swarming with the fact that he and Roxas had a family again. But, that was diminished as he thought about Roxas’s condition again, and he fell back down to reality with a deafening crash. “I don’t know yet, he’s still being examined.” Sora answered softly, his head turning back down to his hands which rested on his lap. Huh, he never noticed the smears of make-up on his pants until just now…

After a small nod, Leon asked, “How are you?”

How was he? Devastated, broken, scared, worried, upset, and angry. “Fine,” Was all he said. His blank state of mind would be completely ruined if he spoke the truth. He wondered where he got the small scars between each of his fingers, which he examined with his hand close to his face. Distractions are wonderful.  
“Don’t give me that bullshit,” Leon sighed, “I’ll ask again: how are you?”

Sora bit his lip and set his hand back onto his lap, his eyes moving to his feet. If he talked about it, he wouldn’t be able to keep his tears in, let alone his thoughts. He didn’t want to cry at a hospital, didn’t want to be one of those people who got the pitiful looks and words from the nurses and other people in the waiting room who knew nothing of why he was crying but shared his sorrow anyway. He didn’t want to be seen as some kid here, that’s not what he was, at all. Maybe if he saw something he could focus on on his shoes, or even the ground…

“I’m…” He started only to stop and take a deep, shaky breath. “I’m scared.” The only emotion that raised above all the others was fear. The only one that seemed to grow worse and worse as the seconds past. He couldn’t focus on other things; not when thoughts zoomed in and out of his head like a seal chasing penguins.  
Leon and Cloud sat on either side of him as he held his head in his hands, his whole body shaking. “I can’t lose another brother; I can’t lose another family member. What am I going to do if I caused this? I’ve done so much to him already, I can’t…” Sora folded in even more on himself, feeling the warmth of Leon’s hand on his upper back, “I can’t even begin to describe how horrible I’d feel for screwing Roxas’s health up. We should have never left Destiny Islands, even if –“

“Do not say that,” Cloud interrupted, “Don’t say you should’ve stayed in that god forsaken foster home. That life there was something that would’ve made Roxas a thousand times worse if it had happened to him. You did the right thing, Sora. You protected him from something that would’ve scarred him for life.”

Sora laughed weakly, “He already _is_ scarred for life, Cloud.” The two men knew exactly why Sora left the foster home in Destiny Islands, and they knew why they were in a foster home to begin with. It ate at Sora every day; the things that Roxas saw, how he couldn’t…

“Roxas is so much happier here than he would have ever been in that foster home.” Leon added gently, “He has a real home now, albeit a little unusual compared to his friends’ houses, but he has a home with people who want him there, not just you. You should be happy that you provided that for Roxas.”

Sora folded his legs crisscrossed on the chair, his knees on the arm rests, as he tugged on the end of his pant leg. “But, I could’ve ruined his health, this could be all-“

“Stop blaming yourself,” Cloud said harshly, “You know what you did was right for both of you. You coming here, living with us, this is the best outcome you could’ve given to you and him. This is not your fault. You’ve been off the street for three years, Sora; something wouldn’t lie dormant for that long. He’s probably just caught something from school.”

Sora glanced at Cloud, saw the sincere look in his blue depths, and he sighed. “I guess so,” Sora murmured before looking at Leon as well. “But, you guys really don’t have to stay here, as much as I appreciate it. I know you both have to be at the club.”

“I can miss a day,” Cloud stated and leaned back in his chair to the left of Sora.

“Naminé can handle the club for me while I’m gone,” Leon informed, doing the same as Cloud on the opposite side. Sora looked between the two of them, saw the look on their faces that said they weren’t going anywhere, and he smiled just slightly. It was nice to have them here, even if they were both stoic and cold looking. Sora saw past their exteriors and silence and knew they truly cared about him and Roxas. This dysfunctional family is exactly what he needed, especially at a time like this. The silent support they gave him made him realize just how fortunate he and Roxas were to have found them.

The three of them sat in silence for another hour, with the exception of occasional talk about where to get food or a drink, or about Sora’s schooling (a GED class that he was trying his best in so he could start piecing a normal life together),or even friendly small debates about TV shows, to pass the time and hopefully distract the youngest brunette from his terrifying thoughts. It worked, for the most part. The conversations were light and easy, which made it effortless for Sora to focus on them.

In the middle of the three of them debating who the better character is in one of the shows they watched together, a doctor came out and called for Hikari. Sora jumped up and made his way to the doctor, with Leon and Cloud trailing close behind him. “How is he? What’s the diagnostic?” Sora asked, but it came out as more of a blur of words with the speed.

The doctors’ one visible aqua colored eye turned to Sora, and somehow he understood what Sora asked in order to answer him, “I’m Doctor Zexion Ishida; we are unsure about what caused him to faint, so we will need to run a few tests to determine what caused it. He hasn’t woken up yet but his vitals are normal. He should wake up soon, but I’d like to keep him over night to monitor him. Otherwise, family can visit him.” Zexion informed the three of them as he pushed his slate colored bangs only slightly out of his face, and Sora nodded slowly.

“What type of tests?” Sora asked tentatively. It wasn’t the tests he was afraid of; it was the result. He wanted to know what was wrong with Roxas but hoped to God it wasn’t anything bad. But, if Zexion wished to run tests then it might be more severe than he thought.

“A blood test should explain what we need to know,” Zexion explained, checking his pager as it beeped a few times.

Sora glanced at Leon and Cloud before saying, “Do what you need to do, then. Figure out what’s wrong with my brother,” Sora said quietly, before, “Can we go see him now?”

“Are you all related?” Zexion asked, eyeing the two older men.

Sora nodded almost instantly, “Yes, we’re all related. Room number, please.” With the room number in mind, the three of them made their way up to the third floor and to room thirteen, where they quietly entered and Sora made his way to Roxas’s side. He listened to the heart monitor beeping calmly and looked at Roxas’s face. The blonde looked restless almost, not peaceful as most people do when they’re asleep. His face was slightly scrunched, perhaps in a nightmare, and it resembled that of a child who had scraped their knee and they were about to start crying. Sora slowly ran his fingers through Roxas’s spikes, causing the blonde to relax visibly, as if he knew that Sora was there now.

“He doesn’t look good,” He whispered, more so to himself than to Cloud and Leon. The two other men sat down in the chairs on the opposite side Sora was standing on, their eyes also on the sleeping blonde. “He looks like he needs a lot of sleep, and food,” Sora continued whispering as he settled down beside Roxas on the bed. His heart felt like it was in a vice grip; it hurt more and more the longer he looked at his little brother, but he wasn’t about to turn away.

Roxas was Sora’s everything. Sora was supposed to be an only child (his mother had a heart disease and wasn’t even supposed to have Sora), but when they found out his mother was pregnant, Sora was overjoyed. He had always wanted a younger sibling, ever since he could form a sentence. His friends all had siblings, older or younger, and he wanted that. Sora asked and asked and asked for a little brother or sister, and when his parents gave him the news he was going to have two little brothers, he screamed with excitement.

Sora had just turned seven when the twins were born, and he was quick to become an amazing older brother. He always played with the two of them, taught them simple things like shapes or letters, he even helped change diapers or feed one while his mother fed the other. Roxas was the younger twin, by about an hour, but the two were identical in appearance nonetheless. Even to their mother they were hard to tell apart, but Sora was always able to tell the difference even if they tried to fool him. He knew everything about his little brothers.

But, ever since that day, things had been much different. Roxas wasn’t the same as he used to be, but Sora accepted the reason why and didn’t try to change Roxas back. Sora continued to love Roxas with as much love as he could give, and the twins were everything Sora ever had. Since Sora wasn’t keen to relationships or finding a boyfriend when he was in middle and high school, he had given all his love and caring to his two little brothers; more so Roxas now that the other twin was gone. And, since they were homeless for so long, Sora and Roxas were extremely close by force. They became the only biological family they had left in a single afternoon. The rest of their family – grandparents, uncles, aunts – were never around when the three were growing up, and had little to no knowledge about them.

Roxas fainting… it truly terrified Sora. Not just for the obvious reasons as to why Roxas would collapse, but for the small fact that this could be the beginning of the end. Something could have been seriously wrong with his little brother; he could lose Roxas, too. If he lost Roxas… he doesn’t know what he’d do. He had spent so long making Roxas his priority that he didn’t even know what to do with his own life. But, God forbid, if something happened to Roxas, Sora would be able to find out what it is he needs to do in life. Well, he hoped.

Sora hunched slightly over and pressed his forehead against Roxas’s, closing his eyes as he just listened to Roxas’s steady breathing. The normal function soothed Sora, as odd as that was. It reassured him that Roxas was okay, he was alive and breathing. Made him think whatever caused the faint was just a minor thing that can be fixed easily. That simple thought brought a small smile to Sora’s lips, and he sat back up. “He’ll be fine.” Sora confidently, but quietly, spoke. He heard Leon hum softly in agreement, which brought Sora’s attention to the two men.

“I forgot you two were here for a second,” Sora whispered and chuckled lightly, his fingers going back into Roxas’s hair to further relax the sleeping blonde. “But, again, you two can go. Now that we know he’s okay, you don’t need to be here. I’m probably going to stay though. I want to be here if he wakes up.”

Cloud nodded once, “We’re staying, too. You can’t get rid of family that easily, Sor,” Cloud teased with a soft smile.

“Exactly. We’ll leave when Roxas is allowed to leave,” Leon added and got more comfortable in the chair he was in. Sora breathed out and smiled his usual bright smile.

“Thanks, guys,” He said and stayed sitting on the bed beside Roxas. He wasn’t going to sleep that night, and he was fine with that. As long as he made sure Roxas was alright while he slept, he didn’t mind.

Sora lost track of time easily, and noticed that Cloud and Leon had fallen asleep; Leon’s head on Cloud’s shoulder with Cloud leaning his head on top of Leon’s. The two weren’t dating, and they never would. Leon was straight, Cloud was gay. Sora knew the two of them have been best friends since they were toddlers, and they’ve really never been apart, except for when they went to separate colleges. Even then, they never once lost contact or stopped checking in on each other.

There wasn’t much Sora knew about them – well, nothing in extreme detail. He knew Leon’s mother was a drug addict, and Cloud’s parents were rarely home after he turned ten, and that Cloud turned into a stoic ass when some incident happened when he was in college. But, other than that, everything about those two was a secret. That didn’t bother Sora. He knew them very well either way, without the details.

Sora had begun to drift off every now and then, but he was determined to stay awake. He occupied himself with doing random stretches beside Roxas’s bed, going out in the hall and talking to the nurses at their station about pointless things, or simply playing stupid games by himself that gave him great amusement with his sleep deprivation (such as I Spy). He kept himself as occupied as he could, since he knew if he stopped for even a second he’d be entrapped by his thoughts.

However, Sora had gotten so used to a normal sleeping schedule that staying up later than three in the morning was difficult for him. He yawned widely and lay beside Roxas, curling slightly on his side with his arm around his younger brother to make sure that Roxas knew he was there. It took only a few seconds for him to fall into a black oblivion. He didn’t dream that night.

In the morning, he was woken up by Roxas lightly shaking him. “Sora… Sora, wake up,” Roxas whispered quietly. “You’re squishing me.” Roxas spoke a little louder, making a strained exhale as he wiggled around to try and get out from underneath Sora.

Sora groaned and only wrapped his arms tighter around the small blonde, “You’re stuck here,” Sora mumbled. This was nothing new; Sora was a major cuddler when he slept, and Roxas was always the one to be cuddled too tight by Sora.

“Pleaseee?” Roxas whined, pushing at Sora’s chest, “There isn’t enough space on this bed for you to do this, this isn’t fair.” Roxas huffed and quickly admitted defeat, letting Sora kiss his blonde spikes and slowly move away from him.

“Fine, fine,” Sora said and sat up, stretching his arms up. He then rubbed his eyes and looked towards the chairs that were supposed to be occupied by Leon and Cloud, but found they were empty. “Huh. Must’ve gone home,” Sora said to himself and stood. “Well, it’s early. I bet we could get you signed out and head home ourselves. Sound good?” Sora asked and turned his attention back to Roxas, easily shoving his own exhaustion back to be replaced by his normal enthusiasm.

Roxas nodded and sat up as well, yawning quietly. “I’m kinda hungry,” Roxas stated. “Can we get pancakes, from that one place that makes them into stars?” Roxas asked with big puppy eyes.

Sora chuckled and helped Roxas out of the bed. “Of course. Then, we go home, and you continue to rest all day today, understood? I want to make sure you’re okay,” Sora handed Roxas his shoes, waiting for the blond to get them on and tied before leaving the room with him. They went to the nurses’ station and got Roxas checked out (after one last quick check up with Zexion to make sure Roxas was alright to leave), and were about to leave in the elevator when they were stopped by Leon and Cloud.

“We’re gone two minutes and both of you up and leave?” Cloud growled, “Rude.” He then crossed his arms and Sora laughed, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Whoops. Thought you two went home,” Sora waved a hand in the air at the look they both gave him. “What? I wasn’t really expecting you two to be here at all anyway, automatically I’m going to assume you both just went home in the morning. Anyway, the nurses said Doctor Zexion should have Roxas’s test results in a few days and he’ll give me a call. So, I’m taking Roxas to get breakfast before we go home, if you two want to join.” Sora invited and got on the elevator, holding Roxas’s hand to make sure he stayed close.

Leon and Cloud nodded and decided to join the Hikari’s for breakfast. They went their separate ways to drive there, and met at the somewhat desolate, but extremely popular, diner. It was a three story diner, shaped like a crooked tower with storage rooms branching off the main tower at random intervals. The outside was an almost light brown color, with the roofs being a bluish-greenish color. The windows were cut out and shaped to be moons or stars, and the same shapes were painted onto the roofs with lighter blues. Trees and small bushes were littered near the outskirts of the area, giving it a more secluded feel. The place was run by a man named Yen Sid, and therefore, the name of the diner was “Yen Sid’s Tower.” Not much creativity, but everyone in Twilight Town loved the food and theme.

Sora and Roxas were regulars here. Roxas absolutely adored the diner because of its theme, and Sora enjoyed it for the same reason. One of their favorite waitresses was, luckily, working today, and she knew Cloud and Leon since high school. Yuffie kept in touch with the two older men and saw them outside of the strip club regularly, and she was always ecstatic to see Roxas and Sora.

“My little Roxstar is back!” Yuffie exclaimed as she came rushing over from the back of the diner, scooping the blonde up and hugging him tight. Roxas laughed lightly but instantly tried to get out of her grasp. “Oh, and you guys brought Leon and Cloud, too!” She grinned widely at Leon and Cloud and set Roxas back on the ground, resting her arm on his shoulder as she leaned against him.

“Yeah, they wanted to come today,” Sora said with a grin at Yuffie. Leon and Cloud said their hello’s to Yuffie and both faced a huge hug from the small girl; Leon hugging her back while Cloud awkwardly patted her back. “So, how’s work today? Busy as usual?” Sora asked once she had stepped away from Leon and Cloud.

“I just started my shift, actually,” Yuffie answered, “I bet I could get you guys your favorite table. Let me go check real quick.” She gave a slight wave and scampered off up the stairs.

“I will never get used to her energy,” Cloud muttered and sighed through his nose. “It was hard enough getting used to Sora’s energy.” He added with a chuckle.

“I do not have that much energy,” Sora countered defensively, “I am one of the most calm people you have ever met! My energy levels are almost always all the way down here!” Sora leaned slightly down and put his hand near the floor, but he instantly straightened up. “Nah, who am I kidding? I’m about as hyper as Yuffie.” Sora said with a grin, putting his hands on his hips.

“Exactly, and most of the time, you’re thirty times more hyper than Yuffie,” Leon pointed out, crossing his arms. Sora rolled his eyes and ignored Leon. Of course he was hyper; he couldn’t help it. It was like… he was programmed this way.

“You guys are in luck!” Yuffie shouted happily as she came skipping back over to them. “Follow me! By the way, Rikku and Yuna are on duty right now, they’ll be by to see you two once they get a chance,” She informed the group, leading them upstairs and to the third floor, setting them down at a table directly beside one of the moon shaped windows. This was their favorite table for obvious reasons; they could see almost everything in the area – the numerous trees, the beautiful sky, and sometimes a wild animal or two –, and the distant Twilight Town. Of course, this view didn’t beat the one atop the Clock Tower.

“Sounds great,” Sora grinned at Yuffie and sat down. “Rox and I will have the usual.” He told the excited waitress and folded his arms on the table. He idly played with the napkin still folded neatly in front of him as Cloud and Leon ordered their food, and he turned his attention to Roxas. “You feel alright? Not dizzy? No stomach aches? Just because the doctor said you can go home doesn’t mean you’re one hundred percent better, you know.”

Roxas shook his head lightly and turned his head down. “No, I feel fine,” He spoke softly, almost inaudibly. “I’m… I’m really sorry I scared you and Leon and Cloud yesterday. I didn’t think I’d faint. Most of the time the dizziness just fades away after a few seconds.” Roxas bit his lip and pulled on his checkered bracelet nervously, his eyes watching his own actions.

“Wait, you’ve had these before? The dizziness?” Sora quickly asked, putting his hand on Roxas’s shoulder to turn him slightly so he could look at the blonde’s face. Sora’s mouth was open in shock. He thought this was a onetime thing, not that it had happened before. That meant it could be something more serious… but, he couldn’t tell Roxas that. He didn’t want to scare his little brother. “Why didn’t you tell me? We could’ve gotten you into the doctors earlier.”

Roxas kept his head down, a frown evident in his voice, “I didn’t want to worry you. I thought… I thought they’d just stop, but they didn’t, and… and I didn’t want to make you pay for a check-up.” Roxas admitted slowly.

That stung. Sora sighed and ran a hand through his hair before he lowered his voice so only Roxas could hear. “Roxas, I never want you to worry about money for us. I have a lot saved up since we moved in with Leon and Cloud, and I can afford a doctor if you need one. If you’re not feeling well, tell me, alright? I want you to be okay.” Sora reassured with a smile as Roxas hesitantly looked up at him.

It hurt that Roxas thought Sora wouldn’t be able to pay for a doctor. It hurt more that Roxas even worried about that sort of thing – Sora always made sure to keep Roxas as pre-teen as he could, so the blonde could grow up normally, but it seemed even that was a lost cause. At the same time, he felt like there wasn’t much he could do to stop Roxas from growing up too fast. The blonde had always been extremely mature, even when he was young.

“Okay,” Roxas said after a few silent seconds consisting of eye contact, “I’ll make sure to tell you next time I get dizzy.” Roxas offered a small smile up at his brother, and Sora grinned in response. He ducked his head slightly when Sora ruffled his hair, but didn’t protest. They turned their attention back to Leon and Cloud, and started a new conversation.

“So, Sora, do you know what you want to do for a living? Certainly being a backstage artist at a strip club isn’t what you want as a career.” Leon asked, leaning back in his seat as his blue eyes bore into Sora’s.

Sora exhaled and made a small groan. “I have no idea. It’s really hard to decide. When I was in high school, I guess I liked drama the best, but at the same time that’s a hard business to get into. Acting, I mean.” Sora explained. He had been one of the drama geeks all the way through elementary to high school, and he always favored that over everything else. He was in numerous school plays and musicals, so he had no problem being in front of others.

“I think you should be a singer,” Roxas stated matter-of-factly. “You have a really nice voice. Plus, it’d be cool if you were a singer. We could travel all over the world!” Roxas grinned and Sora laughed.

“I wish, Rox, but that’s an even harder business to get into,” Sora said, but at Roxas’s frown he quickly tacked on, “But, I’ll try, just for you. Even if I don’t get a job as a singer, at least I tried, right?” Sora asked and glanced at Leon and Cloud, who nodded a few times in agreement.

“I’d think of an alternate option, though. Just in case,” Leon informed and turned his gaze to just past Sora’s shoulder. Sora’s brows furrowed in confusion and he turned his head to look over his shoulder – only to come face to face with Rikku, and he practically jumped out of his chair.

“Rikku!” He shouted, holding in the scream that wanted to pierce the air with the instant fright that coursed through him, ignoring the gleeful laughter she emitted. “Don’t do that! And, you, blondie!” Sora turned his “anger” towards Cloud, who was snickering in his seat across from Sora (it was obvious Leon did not see Rikku coming either), “You need to warn me of things like that, I could’ve punched her!” Sora glanced at Roxas, who was giggling like a mad man in his seat.

“I don’t _need_ to warn you. It’s more fun when you freak out over stupid things anyway,” Cloud said and laughed softly, his arms folded.

Sora pouted in the most angry way he could possibly muster. “It’s not fun for anyone! Especially if I di-“

“Soraaa, shut up!” Rikku cut him off, putting her hands on his hips. “Don’t I deserve a hug? And Yunie, too? We took time off our route to come see you!” She said, then held her arms out wide to Sora, who slowly hugged her. “Oh, don’t give me that weak hug.” She threatened lowly before hugging Sora as tight as she could.

“H-hey!” Sora squeaked and did his best to hug her back like he usually did. “I was just joking! Don’t squish me to death!” He choke-laughed, surprised that the small girl had so much strength – she was a lot like Yuffie in that matter. He took a deep breath when Rikku let go before he hugged Yuna. The two girls then went to hug Roxas before standing beside the table.

“It’s been a while since we’ve seen you two,” Yuna pointed out to Leon and Cloud. “Yuffie says you guys come by all the time but we never see you. Must be because you’re both so quiet.” Yuna brushed her hair back over her shoulder.

“Oh, no, they just make it to where they’re as unnoticeable as they possibly can be so no one else bothers them.” Sora explained before laughing and sitting back down in his chair.

Rikku gaped at the two before Leon quickly said, “That’s not the case. We don’t come here much, actually. Yuffie over exaggerates everything.”

Sora put his hand up between him and Rikku to cover his lips and he whispered, “They’re too stoic to leave the house.” Sora winked at Rikku and snickered with her.

The two girls were only able to chat for five minutes before their work duties called and the foursome were left alone again. Sora kept conversations going with the other three, sharing laughs at stupid jokes or listening to someone tell a story. Throughout the time, though, Sora was plagued and sometimes distracted by the distinct thought that something was seriously wrong with Roxas.

Every now and then, Sora would look at Roxas and see the blonde look more and more pale, but then the color would return after a couple minutes. It was strange, and it scared Sora to no end. He could just barely see miniscule red dots all over Roxas’s skin if he stared long enough, and it was easy to notice the dark bruises that littered his arms or legs. He had been bruising unusually easy lately and that worried Sora as well. Even the nose bleeds had increased, and Sora felt as if everything was his fault, even if Cloud or Leon or anyone else told him otherwise.

Roxas meant so much to him, naturally. Even in those moments when Roxas and his twin were little and they’d purposely have temper tantrums to get what they want, or when they screamed at Sora for doing something “wrong,” or even when Roxas tended to just be a child and hurt Sora’s feelings (but he always apologized later), Sora still loved Roxas more than life itself. Like he thought about earlier, Roxas was all he ever had. Well, Roxas and his twin, Ventus.

He couldn’t even begin to describe how many times he happily babysat his two little brothers over going to a party with his friends at Destiny Islands, or how he would drop his own school work to play with them. He always has cherished his siblings, and if he lost Roxas now, he’d lose himself.

 _Lost to the darkness_ , he thought, a sullen expression in place for a brief moment.

He put an arm around Roxas’s shoulders and pulled him as close as he could bring him and pressed his lips against his head. “You know, I love you,” Sora whispered and grinned when Roxas scoffed.

“I had no idea. I always thought you hated me, or were just bringing me along for the ride.” Roxas mocked and rolled his blue eyes. “I love you, too.” He said with a big smile.

Yuffie scampered up to the table with a tray resting on her shoulder and her hand supporting it underneath. “Wow that took a lot longer than usual, sorry about that!” She apologized and set the food in front of each person at the table, “Our chef got pissed off at everyone else; wouldn’t even let anything out of the kitchen. Paine can be such a pain, I swear.” Yuffie sighed and shook her head, but smiled when Roxas laughed at the joke.

“Well, as difficult as she is, she makes amazing food,” Cloud complimented before starting to eat.

“Yeah, say thanks for us, will ya?” Sora asked and also started eating happily. Yuffie nodded and waved at the group before she left to go attend to another table that waved her down.

They were more focused on eating once the food arrived, but they did occasionally talk. Mostly, it was Sora, since Sora couldn’t keep his mouth shut and eat for more than two minutes. They finished their meal slowly, enjoying each bite, and once they were done, they stayed at the diner for another half hour, just talking. It was pleasant – carefree.

“See, Leon, that’s where you’re wrong,” Cloud objected Leon’s statement, “If there was to be a fight between us, I’d so kick your ass.”

Sora instantly covered Roxas’s ears, “Cloud! There’s a _child_ here!” He hissed, keeping his hands over Roxas’s ears despite Roxas complaining about how he hears swearing all the time. “You do not Roxas, be quiet now.”

“Cloud, you would not win against me,” Leon stated easily, “You would lose so quickly it’d take you a while to realize it.” Leon smirked and let Cloud glare at him.  
“Bullshit! Sora, who do you think would win?” Cloud turned to the younger brunette, who was usually the tie breaker whenever Cloud and Leon began arguing about pointless things.

“Well, let’s see here,” Sora began, uncovering Roxas’s ears to discuss with him, “On one side, Leon has the strategic skills and the ability to see what someone is planning to do, and he’s just smarter than Cloud.” The two brothers ignored Cloud who protested to the last part.

“But, Cloud has the steely expression that makes it hard for even Leon to decipher Cloud’s next moves, and Cloud is fast,” Roxas added slowly, putting a hand to his chin in deep thought.

Sora also held his chin in thought, “And they both have the muscles to match each other evenly for the physical confrontation…” Sora pointed out, before they leaned in and covered their lips, an intense whispering battle starting up between them.

Cloud and Leon looked at each other than sighed. This is usually how these arguments were settled; Sora and Roxas agreed on something and gave the verdict. As strange as it was, it was better that the younger blonde and brunette settled this for the two older men, or they’d be fighting about it all night and would end up being pouty, brooding adults for not actually resolving anything.

“Okay! We’ve decided!” Sora triumphantly said to snap Leon’s and Cloud’s attention back to them. “Considering you both have different strong points mentally but the same strong abilities physically-“

“It’d be a draw, or it’d depend on who got the killing blow first.” Roxas finished before him and Sora nodded in unison.

Leon and Cloud looked about to protest before they sighed. “It pisses me off that that makes sense,” Cloud murmured and crossed his arms.

“It seems we’d work better being on the same team, hm?” Leon inquired before taking a sip of his coffee. “Anyway, it’s about time we head back home.”

Sora nodded in agreement. “I’ll pay for Roxas and I’s meal.” He stood up and pulled Roxas’s seat out for him, waited for Leon and Cloud to stand as well, and then they made their way back downstairs to pay at the register. Once that was done, they said farewell to Yuffie, Rikku, and Yuna before they once again parted ways to go home in their separate vehicles.

The trip home was mostly silent. Sora wished he could turn the radio on for them, but the car was as beat up and worn down as they got, and, therefore, had no radio. Most of the time, they’d sing a song they knew by heart, but for some reason, it didn’t feel right to sing at this moment. Perhaps the incident with Roxas fainting was still eating at Sora’s mind – saying “perhaps” was an understatement. The thought was like a plague in his head right now.

“Are you feeling alright?” Sora asked and took a few short glances towards Roxas. He saw the blonde nod out of the corner of his eye. “No dizziness? What about your stomach? Does it hurt? Or what about-“

“If I was in pain at all, I wouldn’t nod when you asked if I was okay, Sora.” Roxas snapped, glaring at his brother. “Don’t treat me like some sick kid, I fainted once, I’m not dying. Stop freaking out. It’s not cool.”

Sora was silent for a couple minutes. Roxas had never gotten mad about Sora’s concern for his health or well-being; in fact, Roxas always liked the worry. “I’m… I was just… Sorry.” Sora quietly spoke, biting his tongue to stop himself from asking anymore questions.

Sora frowned to himself. Was he worrying too much? Maybe he was scaring Roxas. He couldn’t even imagine purposely scaring his brother; it wasn’t a part of who he was. But, it was possible that his questions were scaring the blonde, maybe his little episode frightened him as much as it did Sora. Either way, Sora was sure to keep quiet.

They arrived back at the club with barely any words passed between them, and they silently made their way up to the small house above the club. Leon and Cloud weren’t home yet, and Roxas went straight to their make-shift room and shut the door (that had been installed the same week they arrived, so the brothers had privacy if they needed it). Sora let out a sad sigh and plopped down on the couch, toying with his crown necklace that Roxas had given to him for his 18th birthday.

 _At least he’s resting, like I asked him to._ Sora thought before tucking his knees underneath him. He let out a sigh and rubbed his head before turning the TV on. He promised himself that whatever was wrong with Roxas he’d fix, even if it ran him through hell and back.

\---

The week had gone by quasi normally. Sora kept himself busy with work and Roxas helped him in the club every other night (Sora made him stay in the room and relax), and Sora had gotten calls from Doctor Zexion saying that he had to wait longer because they needed to examine the blood further. Sora didn’t mind; much. Of course, he wanted to know what was wrong with his brother, but at the same time, he’d rather it be kept a mystery and act like it never happened. He bit his tongue so many times trying to stop himself from asking Roxas if he was okay that his tongue had bled several different times, but the blonde didn’t seem to have any problems except for his bloody noses.

Cloud and Leon were being extremely helpful with everything as well. They kept their usual calmness in check to tame Sora down whenever he seemed about ready to snap from needing to know how Roxas was, and they helped keep Roxas’s mind off it the most; doing projects that had very little physical labor with the youngest blonde, playing games, helping with homework or simply talking to him. Sora appreciated their effort, and joined in on the distractions the majority of the time.

Today, however, Zexion had left a message saying that Sora and Roxas, and whomever else wanted to join, needed to come down to the hospital so he could give the diagnostic. That gave Sora a brand new fear, because if it was nothing Zexion would’ve just told him that on the phone, but he kept his outward appearance as energetic and happy as usual, so he wouldn’t frighten Roxas. Cloud and Leon were both busy that day – Cloud with visiting his old friend Tifa that he had made plans with months before, and Leon with things that concerned the club – so they couldn’t join, but they wanted the verdict as soon as Sora heard it.

Sora was currently driving with Roxas in the passenger seat, and they chatted about nothing in particular. Their conversations were like walking on eggshells the past week. Sora didn’t want to scare Roxas and Roxas didn’t want to worry Sora more. It was unhealthy they did that, but they did it to protect each other.

They arrived at the hospital and made their way in, Sora holding Roxas’s hand to cross the street, even against the blonde’s protests because “he’s old enough to cross the street without holding hands,” so he says. Sora ignored him and went to the nurses’ station to let one of them know why they were there. They were told to go to one of the examine rooms down the hall and wait for Doctor Zexion there, so, once they were there, Sora got Roxas up on the examine table to sit.

“I never realized how short you are,” Sora pointed out then laughed at Roxas’s glare. “Hey, I’m not the tallest person either, but you’re pretty tiny.”

Roxas crossed his arms and turned his head away, “I’m still growing, don’t make fun of my size.” He whined before turning his head to the door as Zexion stepped in.  
“It’s good to see you two,” Zexion first said, tucking a clipboard underneath his arm. “How have you been this week, Roxas?”

Roxas shrugged some and kept his gaze on his doctor. “Tired, mostly. I did get dizzy a few times, though… but, they weren’t bad.” Roxas explained, trying his best to ignore the look that Sora gave him, the look of “why didn’t you tell me about this.”

“I see,” Zexion flatly said before he let out a sigh. “Sora, if you could step out in the hall with me for a quick second, there’s something very important I need to tell you.” Zexion motioned for Sora to follow, and the brunette did with haste.

“Is there something wrong?” Sora immediately asked once the door to the examine room was shut and he was sure Roxas couldn’t hear.

Zexion looked as if he was struggling with the words, his aqua eye refusing to meet Sora’s bright blue. “We did many different tests on the blood samples that we took from Roxas, and each result came up the same. This isn’t going to be easy to hear,” Zexion warned before finally locking gazes with Sora. “Roxas has acute lymphocytic leukemia, high risk.”

Sora’s whole world seemed to freeze. His mouth hung just slightly open, his breathing hitched, the bustling noise of the hospital was cancelled out, hell, he even felt like his heart stopped beating. Those seven words just created a new fate for Roxas, one that would be painful with chemotherapy or radiation and the side effects, one that doesn’t guarantee life. This meant that Sora’s little sunshine could be taken away from him much too soon.

Instantly, his mind went to how Roxas would cope with this. What if the tiny blonde couldn’t handle the treatment? What would he do if, no matter what he tried, he couldn’t save Roxas? No, no, even if the efforts were for naught, he’d do everything for Roxas, even against his own health. Nothing else mattered anymore, except that he had to keep his brother alive if it was the last thing he could do. Losing Roxas would just be the nail in the coffin for Sora.

How could this even be? Cancer wasn’t something you just… picked up, right? How had Roxas gotten it, of all kids? Not that any kid deserves it, but… this was his sunshine. Sora couldn’t bear being the only Hikari left. It didn’t make sense. Why was fate playing such a cruel game on him? What had he done to have these awful things happen at his home, at the foster home, and now here? Sora was about ready to start voicing these questions, but his throat felt shut and useless at the moment, like something was strangling him.

First Ventus, now Roxas…

Sora was too shocked to do anything, so he just kept staring at Zexion, his mind swamped with those thoughts that concerned the news. Sora forced himself to take a deep breath, and all the noises of the busy hospital came rushing back to him, as did reality which hit him with what felt like a thousand bricks, weighing down heavily on his shoulders to the point where he felt like collapsing. “Are… are you one hundred percent sure?” Sora tentatively, quietly, asked. He could feel his chest restrict in pain and even more worry. He didn’t want to believe what Zexion said, but he had no choice. Once he got a definitive answer, he’d have to figure out a way to tell Roxas, because he couldn’t let Zexion do it for him.

“I am. We ran many tests,” Zexion confirmed, before adding, “I am very sorry.”

Sora slowly shook his head and looked down at the ground. “I want him in the best treatment as soon as possible. I don’t care how expensive it is, I’ll find a way to pay for it. Can you just… get me the names of the doctors who best specialize in these things? Give me any information you can. I’ll go and tell Roxas this.”

Sora was strangely in check now. The news he got made him want to scream at the top of his lungs that this wasn’t fair, he wanted to make Zexion do more tests, he wanted to pretend this was a dream and wake up already. But, deep down, he knew this wasn’t a dream. This was real. And freaking out on Zexion for doing his job, or snapping mentally and not being the rock he knew Roxas would need wouldn’t help anyone. He knew what he needed to do to get his brother help, and he would get it immediately, even if that meant setting aside his break down of the situation until much later, when he was alone and he knew Roxas was getting treatment.

He waited for Zexion to nod and walk away before he took another deep breath. His blue eyes locked onto a specific tile on the ground, and he tried to calm down, even just a little more. When he finally gathered up the courage and ability to talk to Roxas, he slowly stepped into the examine room again.

Sora looked at Roxas – at how innocent the blonde haired boy seemed, with his legs swaying slowly, his hands clasped together loosely, how Roxas’s similar blue eyes travelled around the examine room as he surveyed each poster or diagram hanging on the walls in both curiosity and boredom – and bit back the urge to just… cry and scream, thinking that this little boy would be suffering even more from now on. He forced himself to keep it together. He had to. _For Roxas,_ he reminded himself, walking until he was standing directly in front of Roxas. He forced his brave face on and took one last deep breath.

Sora grabbed Roxas’s hand and lightly kissed the top of it. This was so hard to even begin to put into words, so he just smiled sadly at Roxas and said, “So… Zexion told me you’re… really sick, Sunshine,” His voice was so soft it was basically a whisper. He was trying so hard to stay collected and somehow tell Roxas this without breaking down himself.

“Sick with what?” Roxas asked, a confused stare in place as their eyes locked after Roxas got done reading one of the posters about heart health. Sora tried to answer him, but he was silent for minutes. How could he tell Roxas this? He was only thirteen! All he should be worrying about right now is school and his growing body and hormones and girls or boys, not when his next chemotherapy treatment is or if he’s ever going to be okay.

Sora’s mouth opened and closed a few times before he sat beside Roxas and wrapped an arm around his shoulders, drawing the boy close. “Well, Rox,” Sora began, his gaze averted to his free hand in his lap. “He said that… that you have leukemia.” That last word was choked out. Sora couldn’t help the tears in his eyes, and he could feel Roxas tense up in his arm.

“L-leukemia?” Roxas stuttered, looking up at Sora with the most scared look Sora has ever seen in his blue depths – besides during that incident three, almost four, years ago – and that tore Sora apart, “But I was really healthy! I was always healthy, I played the games in gym a-and – that isn’t possible! I can’t have that! This isn’t fair!” Roxas’s eyes filled with tears, and the crying quickly ensued.

Sora instantly wrapped his other arm around his brother and held him tight. “Hey, hey,” Sora whispered, his voice thick with his own unshed tears. “We’ll get through this, right? You’re so strong, Roxas, it’s crazy. And you have me and Cloud and Leon for support; you’ll get through this, I know you will.”

Sora’s lips pressed against Roxas’s blonde spikes and let out a shaky sigh. Roxas’s body was wracked with tears, and it was getting progressively harder for Sora to stay together. He kept whispering encouraging things to Roxas, hoping the boy would start gaining even a little hope towards fighting this, or even calm him down would be enough right now.

The two brothers were left alone for fifteen minutes, in which Sora was rubbing Roxas’s back and quelling the tears, and were quietly talking about stupid, tension breaking things when a brunette nurse walked in. She offered a smile towards the brothers, and that seemed to put an ease to the tense air. “Hello, my name is Aerith Gainsborough, Doctor Ishida sent me in here to go over treatment options with you. I’m a pediatric oncologist and will be the person helping you and Roxas through the treatment and after. And, of course, I’d love to get to know Roxas.” Aerith explained as she stepped closer to the table they were sitting on and held her hand out to Roxas, a manila folder tucked underneath her other arm.

Roxas was still shy, but he slowly grabbed her hand and shook it. “Hi,” He muttered, his blue eyes red and swollen at this point, then leaned more into Sora, who in turn gave him a squeeze of reassurance.

“That’d be great,” Sora said to her, using his arm to wipe out the remaining tears in his eyes. “Do you want to be here and listen to your options, Rox? Or do you want me to get you the best kind?” Sora asked, his gaze focused on the blonde who was still tucked into his side. Sora knew how smart Roxas was for his age, despite missing the entire 5th grade, and wanted to give Roxas the option of picking something himself if he wanted to do so. It was his fight after all.  
Roxas shook his head, “I want to be here,” He whispered quietly, then turned his attention to Aerith who pulled a chair up to sit in front of the brothers.  
Aerith nodded and grabbed the folder, opening it up on her lap. “First, I’ll explain the phases. We will begin with phase one, where remission induction beings. This phase means we will focus on killing the leukemia cells in the blood and bone marrow to put the leukemia into remission. After that, consolidation or intensification phase will begin, and that is when we will kill any remaining leukemia cells that may make the cancer relapse. Once that is done, phase three will start, also known as maintenance. That is when we will kill any cancer cells that may regrow to cause relapse, and the doses for it will be lower than in the previous two phases.

“Each phase will include combination chemotherapy in high doses along with anticancer drugs which will be given in high doses as well. Intrathecal and systemic chemotherapy are given to prevent or treat the spread of leukemia cells to the brain and spinal cord, but since Roxas’s leukemia hasn’t spread to either, they will be preventing, and no radiation will be needed unless it manages to spread to his brain. Treatments in clinical trials for children with high risk, such as Roxas, will include new chemotherapy regimens, with or without the targeted therapy to stem cell transplant. Now, your treatment options are: chemotherapy, which is required for children such as Roxas; radiation on specific parts of the body where your leukemia is most abundant; chemotherapy with stem cell transplant which replaces the blood cells with that of a donor’s healthy blood, which would most likely be your brother, but that treatment is more so used if your cancer returns; and finally, there is targeted therapy, which uses drugs that identify and attack specific cancer cells without harming normal cells. Treatment must start immediately if we want the best possible outcome.” Aerith finally concluded as she handed a few papers to Sora and Roxas that explained in even greater detail the treatment options and the phases.  
The two brothers looked over the papers carefully, staying quiet while they both digested the information. Everything Aerith had said was more than a lot to take in, and Sora wasn’t sure if he even understood the majority of it. From the look on Roxas’s face, though, it seemed he understood it. At least his little brother was smarter than him with these medical things, but he knew he’d have to brush up on his own skills if he wanted to help Roxas out the best he could. He made a mental note of doing some of his own research that night before Roxas quietly spoke up.

“So… I can start doing clinical trials or a different treatment option whenever I want to, right?” Roxas asked slowly, his blue eyes leaving the papers he was holding to lock gazes with the green eyes of Aerith. When she nodded, he continued, “I think I just want to stick with the chemotherapy, everything else seems like just… too much.” Roxas informed and handed Aerith his papers, “But I wouldn’t mind taking part of the clinical trial later, I just don’t want to start with it.”

Sora looked down at Roxas. The blonde boy looked so fragile, he couldn’t believe he could make such a grown up decision by himself. Of course, Sora understood why Roxas had to grow up so fast, but he didn’t think he’d ever have to decide something like cancer treatments. Sometimes he’s more adult then me, Sora thought and resisted the urge to chuckle. Instead, he rubbed Roxas’s arm and kissed his blonde spikes.

“That’s perfectly fine,” Aerith said and smiled at Roxas, earning a shy smile back, “I will get in touch with another specialist as soon as possible to see about the nearest start date for the chemotherapy. Sora, I’ll need you to come with me to discuss prices and payment plans.” Aerith stood up and motioned for Sora to follow her, but she first turned to Roxas, “I’ll make sure to help you get through this, too. You look like a very strong kid; I bet you’ll recover in no time.” She reassured, and the blonde haired boy slowly nodded in agreement.

After that, Sora left his phone with Roxas so he could play a couple games while Sora was out of the room. He didn’t want Roxas to be left alone with his thoughts; he knew how horrible one’s mind could be.

They discussed a payment plan, and Sora explained over and over again that Roxas only got the best, even if it was three hundred times more expensive than the normal way most people took during the treatment. Sora needed Roxas to survive, and he’d do anything to help his brother. He’d have to talk to Leon about a promotion once he got home.

Sora got to know a little bit about Aerith, and he found out she too knew Leon and Cloud. Now, that was a strange coincidence. The two males had never brought her up before, or perhaps they had and Sora’s faulty memory was getting to him. She had apparently known Leon and Cloud and Yuffie since high school, like they all grew up together. After that was established, Aerith seemed much more interested in taking care of Roxas outside of the hospital, with checking his vitals and making sure he was healthy, as free deal. It was something she said she wanted to do, because Sora seemed like a very caring brother. He had a feeling that knowing her other three childhood friends had something to do with the special treatment, but he wasn’t about to complain. He really lucked out with Aerith.

Once everything was finalized and Aerith left to go make appointments for Roxas, Sora ran a hand through his hair and took a deep breath. This… this was going to be difficult. Especially for Roxas. Scrounging up the ability to keep a happy face on was going to be even harder, but he’d do it. He had to make sure that Roxas kept his spirits up, even if the chemotherapy was going to make him feel like shit. Sora would be there for Roxas every step of the way, and he’d never leave Roxas’s side.

Sora stayed outside the examine room for a few more minutes, collecting his thoughts. He still felt the need to cry, possibly scream about how this still wasn’t fair, or just yell in pure frustration and anger towards everything and everyone, but he kept that part of him down. Again, he decided it’d be better if he let that side of him out later, when he was alone.

Slowly, he pushed open the door and smiled softly at Roxas. “Alright, Rox,” Sora spoke gently, making his way over to the blonde on the examine table as Sora lightly pressed his lips to Roxas’s forehead, “I think it’s time we head home. Today’s been sucky, so, want to get some sea salt ice cream? I bet we have time to go up to the Clock Tower today, too.” Sora stated and helped the frail boy off the table, then they began to leave the hospital.

Roxas was quick to agree to their favorite ice cream, and to go to their favorite place to be to eat said ice cream. So, they clambered back into Sora’s car and drove to the ice cream vendor that knew their names, making very intense talk about almost everything under the sun and under the sea, even as far as the galaxy. It was an obvious distraction from the day’s events, but they both needed a break, even though the cloud of what-the-future-holds hung around them like the town’s notorious sunset.

They made their slow journey up the clock towers steps, and once at the top, settled down comfortably on the ledge in order to look out at the sunset. As they ate their ice cream in silence, Sora began wondering about certain… things he didn’t want to dwell on.

His initial thought was him wondering how much different everything was going to be. Would Roxas need to be home schooled now, or more so, online schooled, due to any horrible side effects from the chemo that made him unable to attend school? He hoped that wouldn’t be the case. Roxas loved going to school now, and he didn’t want to force the blonde to go away from something he actually enjoyed doing. Especially since Roxas had made such a tight knit group of friends with two other boys and a girl. Sora couldn’t imagine ripping Roxas away from that.

The next thought was: what if he can’t afford the top notch medical treatment for Roxas? He still planned on talking to Leon later about a promotion, but even if he got that promotion, would he be able to sustain a steady payment to continue great treatment?

Sora rubbed his forehead and let out a sigh, then looked towards his younger brother, who was currently eating the remainders of the ice cream. A smile came to Sora’s lips, and he leaned over to kiss Roxas’s temple. “You know I love you, right?”

“You know, for how much you tell me that, I don’t know if I believe you,” Roxas gave Sora a mischievous smile, before laughing, which easily caused Sora to laugh as well.

These simple moments always made Sora feel as if everything was still okay. These moments are what Sora thrived for when they were homeless and struggled so hard to survive, but, right now, this particular moment just seemed to… calm Sora down. Even in the manner that would last only a few hours, it made him happy knowing that they could still share a laugh like this together, despite the horrible news that was given to them earlier.

Even so, Sora hoped that moments like these would continue coming, even if life threw them a million curve balls.

\---

Sora and Roxas had ended up spending the day out, doing things that required little to no physical work – excluding walking. After ice cream, they had gone to the mall and Sora spoiled Roxas just a bit (in Sora’s terms, “a bit” was: three bags of clothes, two pairs of new shoes, and at least one bag with five new games in it). He knew he probably shouldn’t have spent a portion of his rainy day funds, especially knowing how much he’d need to be paying the hospital, but, why couldn’t he spoil Roxas? Today was hard for both of them, but Sora knew it was a thousand times harder for Roxas. He felt the boy deserved a bit of spoiling.

Once they arrived back at the Dusks and Shadows, Sora hauled the bags upstairs and told Roxas to go into their room and play some of his new video games. Sora had to talk to Leon immediately, and he needed to tell Leon and Cloud about what the results were from the doctor. He dreaded coming home, but, he couldn’t avoid responsibility forever.

“You two are finally back,” Leon stated as he walked out from his room, his blue eyes glancing towards Cloud who was sitting on the couch and gave a backwards wave towards Sora. “What was the verdict?” Leon asked once Roxas had shut the door to Sora’s and his room.

Sora sighed through his nose and took his shoes off slowly. “Well, it… really sucks,” Sora whispered, instantly drawing the attention of both older males; not just for his quiet voice but for what he said. “Roxas… Roxas has leukemia.” When Sora admitted it out loud, reality gave him a nice punch in the face. It brought things into an even newer light, made him see how real everything was. Made him feel even worse.

Cloud and Leon just stared at Sora silently. Not in the way they usually did, but in an unusual sympathetic way. Both their eyes showed somewhat pity and sorrow themselves, since they were a strange little family now, but words never left their mouths. Sora liked that they didn’t say the cliché things of, “I’m sorry,” or, “it’ll get better,” because as much as those words sounded nice, it made things feel incredibly more terrible. Something about the way they were always said, especially in a hospital or when someone they just met was saying that, made them feel forced and un-meaningful. Sora could tell, just by the two mostly silent people’s looks, exactly what they wanted to say. And that, somehow, felt more sentimental and honest.

“He’s doing chemo, his first appointment is in a week,” Sora further explained, rubbing his forearm slowly, “But, I need to talk to you about a promotion.” Sora turned his gaze to Leon, but it was clear that Cloud wasn’t going to leave and give the two privacy. And, he was the first to speak up.

“No,” Cloud flatly said, “There’s no way you can become a stripper, Sora.”

Sora was taken aback by Cloud’s statement. “And why not? I’m just as capable as the rest of you, I have a fit body, and I’m flexible. I could handle my own as a stripper. I need the money, Cloud,” Sora defensively said, then shook his head, “Wait, why am I even explaining this to you? I need to talk to Le-“

“I agree with Cloud,” Leon cut Sora off, his arms crossed as he leaned against the back of the couch. Sora’s mouth gaped open and Cloud stood up to stand beside Leon. “Stripping just isn’t something you should be doing. I could give you a raise instead.”

Sora shook his head aggressively, “No, no, no. I need more money quickly. I’ve seen how much Jasmine and all of them make in a night, hell, I’ve seen how much Cloud makes in a night, on top of how much you pay them. I need that type of income. I don’t know when the last time you checked how expensive hospitals are, but they’re pretty damn expensive.” Sora explained, not about to back down even if the two older men seemed rather intimidating at this moment.

“No, Sora. You’re still too young. You’re barely twenty,” Leon pointed out, “Even if you’re of legal age to be a stripper, you’re just too young. You do realize that being a stripper means you’d have to expose a lot more of yourself than you’d like?” Leon questioned, his light blue gaze boring into Sora.

“Of course I know that! What, do you think I’m stupid?” Sora snapped, “I am going to have very expensive hospital bills to pay very soon, and I’d love it if I could start making dents, no matter how small, in my debts from the start instead of having one massive final bill in the end. Can you please let me do that?” Sora was getting offended and angry that they would be rejecting him in this way. Why did they decide how Sora paid for things, let alone decided how he ran his life?

“Like Leon said, you’re still young,” Cloud put in, “You look young. A lot of people, males and females alike, will try to seduce you and touch you in every which way.

People are dangerous, Sora. Especially when it comes to drunken idiots with loads of munny.” Cloud added with a grave expression.

“I don’t give a damn about some stranger trying to feel me up, I care about getting Roxas the treatment he deserves!” Sora’s voice steadily rose, but he tried to bring it back down. He didn’t want Roxas to hear them talking about this, but it was difficult to stay calm. “Look, I get you guys are worried about me, but I’ll be fine. _Fine_. Do you hear that? _F-I-N-E._ I can hold my own and can fend off the perverts if I need to. Isn’t that why you have security, too, Leon?” Sora asked and looked at Leon with an accusing stare.

Leon let out a sigh, “Yes, but-“

“Hah! But! But nothing, Leon! I need this promotion!” Sora sternly said, his brows drawn together in anger, “I’m not some child and you both know that. Let me provide for Roxas, like I’ve been doing for the past three years. Give me that promotion Leon, I’m more than deserving of it, and you really don’t want to see how low I will go to give Roxas the proper treatment he needs and deserves.” Sora threatened and looked between both Leon and Cloud.

Cloud rolled his eyes. “Sora, you don’t seem to understand that people will be trying to use you. In any way possible. People get hurt by people like that. Do you want Roxas to lose another family member if you’re sought after, stalked by some guy or girl who gets infatuated with you?”

Sora stared at Cloud, his mouth hung slightly open, “You did not just say that,” Sora lowly said, his blue eyes burning with rage, “You did not just bring losing another family member up to me! Roxas and I have lost three family members! And if anyone is going to lose another family member, it’s going to be me! And I will not lose Roxas, ever! Roxas won’t lose anyone else, I won’t lose anyone else, and I will not let that happen! Don’t ever say that shit again, Cloud!” Sora yelled, stepping forward to shove the older blonde roughly.

Cloud wasn’t about to retaliate, but Leon stepped in and held Sora back from going after Cloud again. Sora wasn’t one for violence. This was just a stress and sadness related aggression, and that was the only reason Cloud didn’t fight back. “Sora, lower your voice, Roxas can hea-“

“Oh, shut up!” Sora then shouted at Leon, grabbing Leon’s arm from around him and he pushed himself away from the older brunette, “Why do you two both think you can tell me what to do?! Neither of you are my dad, my dad is _dead_!” Sora’s breathing was erratic, and he whipped around and stormed out of the small house. He stomped down the stairs, went through the back exit and kicked a nearby garbage can as soon as he was outside with an angry yell.

He shoved his fingers through his brunette spikes, lightly gripped and tugged for a second before he let them go, his hands by his sides and his hands clenched tight into fists. This wasn’t like him. He knew that. But, perhaps him pushing down that feeling of pure sadness was just too much. _If this is me after a day, I won’t be me anymore in a week_ , Sora thought to himself, running his hands through his hair as he took multiple deep breaths to calm himself down.

He paced for a couple minutes before he settled down and sat on the step in front of the back exit. He knew his snapping on the two people he considered family was not the best thing to do, and he knew he’d have to go apologize. Right now, though, he wanted to just sit in the chilling air and breathe, soothe himself until the adrenaline that coursed through him died off and he was left tired.

What Cloud said hit him hard. Roxas losing another family member… Sora would feel so horrible if he let that happen to his little brother. It’d be so unfair on so many levels. To top it all off, Sora had been yelling when he said that, and there was no doubt Roxas heard what he said. He even yelled about his dad… that was a topic Roxas wasn’t allowed to hear about anymore. Last time Roxas caught a glimpse of something that even remotely reminded him of his twin, he had a horrible panic attack, and Sora assumed that anything concerning their family would give the same outcome. The boy hyperventilated, his hands were clutching his chest, and he kept trying to say he couldn’t see right, and after a short while, he passed out. When he woke up, he sobbed for hours, and there was little to nothing Sora could do to assist his younger brother.

Right now, Roxas did not need a panic attack like that.

Sora shuddered slightly as a cold breeze ruffled through his brown spikes, paper riding the wind like a rollercoaster in the air in front of him. He was hoping that Leon would come to his senses and just give Sora the promotion; everyone knew that hospital bills were rarely cheap, and something like chemotherapy would be on the list of “extremely expensive” for a hospital.

Sora sat on the step, deep in thought as well as coming off the adrenaline rush, for roughly an hour before the door opened behind him. The club was going to open soon, and Jasmine, Belle, and Alice had gone around him to get into the back. Alas, the person stepping out of the door behind Sora wasn’t one of the dancers or Naminé coming to get his help, it was Leon. Sora tucked his knees a further bit more into himself, his arms around the appendages loosely. Leon exhaled slowly and put his hand down first as he kicked his legs out in front of him, sitting beside Sora silently.

There were minutes of total quiet that felt like years. Only the sound of the cold wind blowing by could be heard, which brought goose bumps to Sora every now and then, causing the brunette to shudder. Even their breathing was virtually silent. Sora was the first to speak in a whisper, “If you’re here to tell me you can’t give me the promotion because I’m too young or something, then kindly go back inside and leave me the hell alone.”

Leon’s head slowly shook, and he crossed his arms. “Look, Sora…” He began, glancing at the younger brunette, “I know I’m not your real dad, and that I can’t control you , but I don’t want you to have to be your own father like I had to be.” Leon explained, his eyes shut for a brief moment before he looked at Sora fully.

Sora’s head turned to stare at Leon, curiosity getting the better of him. “And why’d you have to be your own father?” Sora asked when Leon didn’t elaborate.

Leon let out a low chuckle. “To put it simply, my father wasn’t around at all when I was growing up. But, that was because I was a bastard child,” Leon leaned back against the door, “My father raped my mother, and, of course, she never tried to contact him, which makes sense. I heard he’s in a prison somewhere, though.”

Sora continued to stare at the man beside him, before tentatively speaking up, “So… you were the man of the house since you were little?”

Leon hummed in response, “Had to take care of my mother, but she hated me from the start. Apparently I look a lot like my father. Naturally, that made her hate me,” Leon let out a sigh and paused for a minute. The look in his eyes made Sora hurt; the other’s light blue eyes were full of pain, and Sora could tell it took a lot just for him to explain this. Sora knew exactly how that felt. “She got into crack when I was about six or so, but I believe you know that already. It made her extremely anxious and paranoid, and since I looked so much like my dad, she saw me as him numerous times as I was growing up, even if I was shorter.

“That’s how I got this scar,” Leon pointed out, “She was very high one day, and she flipped out on me when I came out of my room. Broke a bottle and slashed my face with the glass. I was… fifteen, I believe. I walked to Cloud’s house after I got myself away from her, it was pouring that day, and his mother never let me leave. Very kind lady, even if she wasn’t around much. She knew everything about what was wrong with my mom, so I ended up living with Cloud until we went to separate colleges.” Leon summarized. By the shortness, Sora was able to tell that Leon explaining this was painful and brought up old wounds. Sora hated that he knew that exact feeling. The same thing happened to him when he explained to Leon and Cloud his and Roxas’s past, back at Destiny Islands.

Sora listened to Leon’s story with a frown on his face. “That… sounds awful,” Sora commented once he was sure Leon was done talking. “I’m really sorry about that… I couldn’t imagine having a parent hate me.”

Leon let out another sigh and rubbed his forehead. “Well, there’s nothing you can do about it sometimes,” Leon’s eyes were staring at a pebble by the step they were sitting on, and Sora could tell he was doing the same thing Sora tried to do at the hospital; create a distraction for himself.

Sora frowned even more and he put a hand on Leon’s shoulder, bringing a smile to his lips to replace the frown, “Don’t be upset, alright? It’s in the past, and the past means nothing now. You’ve clearly done very well for yourself, so, in a way, you can thank your mom for being such a crappy mom all those years. Well, don’t thank her, but… you know what I mean.” Sora tried to explain, but ended up laughing softly in the end.

“But, I can see why you’re trying to be a dad to me… As much as I appreciate it, Leon, I am an adult now. I come to you for advice but life decisions like this – they’re mine to decide.” Sora added and put his hand back on his own knee. “Well, and you since you are the boss, but, still.”

Leon nodded and picked the pebble up. “I know that. That’s why I’m giving you that promotion, as much as I hate it. You’re doing what needs to be done for Roxas’s sake, and I can’t deny you that right,” Leon said and tossed the pebble before he stood.

Sora’s eyes widened and he grinned, “Thank you so much… I really needed you to understand this from my perspective.” Sora said and got up as well. _At least this ensures Roxas getting good treatment,_ Sora thought.

“I wouldn’t be able to stop you from a promotion for long.” Leon chuckled softly and pat Sora’s hair. “You’re too persistent.”

Sora grinned and laughed, “I always am, and I’m very persuasive, too,” Sora brushed Leon’s hand off and stepped back so Leon could open the door.

“Cloud will start teaching you the basics tomorrow and you can join in on the performance tomorrow night, since it’s ladies night,” Leon explained, “Right now, you should probably help Naminé get set up and go check on Roxas.” Leon finished and walked inside.

Sora nodded and followed Leon in, before he parted ways with his boss and went upstairs. Leon hadn’t said anything about a panic attack, so that in itself was good news. Or, had no one been to check on Roxas since he went into their room?

That one thought made Sora speed up and fast walk into the small house, then over to their bedroom door. He gave a slight knock before entering, his eyes immediately landing on Roxas. His brain wanted him to say, “Oh, I’m glad you’re okay,” but, instead, he stood there with his mouth hung slightly open in shock.

Roxas was sitting on their bed, looking at an old, very old, pop-up book Sora had in his drawers. It was a pop-up book he used to read to the twins every night; it was a short children’s book about the stars and other worlds, how they were all connected. Roxas and his twin enjoyed it so much, but more so Ventus. When the incident happened, the book had been one of the only things Roxas grabbed before he was hastily torn out of the house by Sora, and ever since, it had been a sort of memento. A memento that usually made Roxas have panic attacks.

But, here he was, sitting on their bed and calmly reading it as if his twin was still beside him to this day. Roxas slowly turned his head up when he heard the door open, locked eyes with Sora for a brief moment, then went back to flipping through the pop-up book. Quietly, oh so quietly, Roxas whispered, “I miss him.”

Those three words hurt Sora so much, but he knew it’d hurt Roxas more. Sora took the few steps over to the bed and sat beside Roxas, his arm going around the younger’s shoulders to pull the boy into Sora’s frame. “I miss him, too,” Sora whispered back, rubbing Roxas’s upper arm in a comforting gesture. “But, we have each other, right?”

Roxas shrugged lightly, his fingers tracing over one of the stars that went up higher than the others. “Yeah, but, I miss him. Don’t you ever wonder what it’d be like if he were here, too?” Roxas asked and turned to the next page. “I mean… things would probably be a lot different. Do you think he would’ve gotten leukemia?”

Sora let out a soft sigh, his hand moving up Roxas’s arm and into his blonde spikes to start combing through them gently. “I don’t know, love. I do wonder about it from time to time, but we both know it’s better to stay away from those thoughts. So, how about I read you this book like we used to and you get to sleep?” Sora offered, glancing at the book then down at Roxas’s face.

“I… yeah… that sounds nice… even if it won’t be the same without him.” Roxas muttered and handed the book off to Sora, before he wiggled down underneath the covers. Sora smiled at the blonde and continued to run his fingers through his spikes, propping his knees up to hold the book in place as he began to read.

The book took only about three minutes to read, considering Sora read it slowly and more “creatively” in a sense. He read it in a deeper voice for the narration and gave each character a different tone depending on who they were. It was how he used to read it with both of them, and it made them both fall asleep with smiles on their faces. Even now, Sora was able to bring a smile to Roxas’s face with his silly voices, and, just like old times, Roxas was asleep by the end of it. Sora wondered if either of the twins ever actually _heard_ the end of the story, since they always seemed to fall asleep before Sora got to that point.

Roxas hadn’t brought up what Sora yelled to Leon and Cloud about, so that was good for Sora. At least he hadn’t caused a panic attack with bringing up their dad, and Roxas hadn’t given himself a panic attack for looking at the pop-up book. Though, he wondered why he was reading it in the first place… _That’s a question for another time,_ he thought.

Sora shut the book and set it on the bedside table, his eyes on the boy with a soft expression. He couldn’t believe Roxas was able to listen to this story and stay calm, hell, he even remembered Ventus. Not that the other twin would become a topic of conversation just yet, but that showed extreme progress.

“Goodnight, Sunshine,” Sora whispered as he leaned down to press his lips gently against Roxas’s forehead, “Sweet dreams.” He tacked on before slowly and quietly moving out of the bed. He double checked to make sure the blonde was covered by the blankets before he hid the book back in his drawers and silently left the room, shutting the door behind him.

He let out a quiet sigh and leaned back against the door, his eyes shut. Everything that had happened today put a whole new future ahead of Sora and Roxas, even Cloud and Leon since they’ve become so close to the two brothers. Sora knew that from this point forward, things would be a lot different. Sora would start dancing and getting plenty of “extra” money; although, exposing himself didn’t bother him as much as he thought it would. He was nervous, of course, but he didn’t mind the fact. He knew he was doing it for Roxas, and that was reason enough to not care about who saw him almost naked.

Tonight would be the last night he could consider his life normal, and that was fine with him. When he left Destiny Islands when he was sixteen with a ten year old Roxas in tow, he knew what he was getting himself into. He wished their parents were still alive to take care of them, but fate chose a different life for the two brothers.

Even with everything they’ve been through, the extreme mental trauma both of them had and the physical toll that life had given them, Sora couldn’t wish for a different life. One without the leukemia would be great, but he could never ask for a life without Leon and Cloud. The two men had become such a huge part of Sora and Roxas’s lives that Sora couldn’t fathom living anywhere else, or doing a different job. He was grateful for them, even if the majority of the time they were silent.

“Hey, you alright?”

 _Speak of the devil,_ Sora thought with a smile as he opened his eyes to come face to face with Cloud, who was looking at him with concern in his steely blue eyes. “Oh, yeah, fine. Just thinking,” Sora answered and pushed off the door.

“About?” Cloud asked and took a step back from Sora.

“That I’m happy Roxas and I ended up here, even if it was hell to get here,” Sora responded and walked over to the front door and moved down the stairs to the club, Cloud following him.

Cloud chuckled lightly. “Surprisingly, I can agree with you,”

Sora gave a curt nod, then went to help Naminé set up. He was in a strangely “peaceful” mood now, despite the day’s events. Yelling at Leon and Cloud before had apparently done some good for him, for it released some pent up stress and the horrible feelings he felt earlier that day.

Sora didn’t know what the future held or what to expect in the least, but what he did know was that he was ready to help Roxas through this difficult time no matter what, even if he put his life further on hold then he already had. And he had just started looking for someone to be intimate with…

No matter. Finding his true love could wait, right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that’s the first chapter! Yeah, prologue then chapter 1 and still no Riku? Well, fear not, Riku shall be coming very, very soon. So hang on until then, this story has plenty of plot. Don’t know when I’ll update next but it will be soon!
> 
> Also, I did extensive research on the leukemia info. If anyone has any corrections regarding that portion, please, let me know. I don’t want it to be wrong in any way. 
> 
> [Disregard any grammar mistakes, I am still editing even when it is published]


	3. Chapter 2

Song: [Give It to Me by Timbaland feat. Nelly Furtado & Justin Timberlake](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RgoiSJ23cSc)

\---

The smell of alcohol assaulted his nose as soon as he stepped foot in the club. Loud beating of the music felt like it was in his chest, vibrating through his bones, and he sighed through his nose silently. This was _not_ him. Being in a strip club went against almost every morale the man had, but he couldn’t go against his Chief’s orders. It was his turn to scout out the downtown district, especially since his squad had gotten the responsibility of gangs in the area.

The man paid a fee to continue into the club to a man that looked to be the owner. After ordering a light drink, he made his way to a table that was dimly lit and set up in the corner of the club. That was perfect for him – it’d be easy to survey the area and avoid catching a glimpse of the dancers. Settling down in the dark leather seat, he leaned forward, elbows on the table, as his aqua eyes began looking around the club.

Nothing unusual or even remotely suspicious – just drunk men fawning after dancers that they knew they couldn’t have and women talking avidly amongst themselves about the male dancers. The way these are portrayed in the movies is completely wrong. Everyone always thinks there’d be only gang members at strip clubs, making deals and buying all the dancers for a lap dance, but it’s quite the contrary. In fact, it’s almost rare that an entire group of gang members come here to do anything illegal. Most of them just need a reason to jack off instead of hiding out in a bathroom with a phone.

The man let out another sigh and ran a hand through his silver locks before he grabbed his phone out of his front pocket. He idled for a while, reading texts from his friends that were mainly, “ _Man, you need to take a few days off!”_ _“Riku come on, come hang out with us for once!”_ or, these, which were his favorite, _“Found this chick I think you’d wanna bang.”_ The ones about hooking up with random chicks always made him chuckle quietly.

It wasn’t because he was gay – he was bisexual – it was the fact that some of his friends believed he’d only hook up because he wanted sex. Riku was never fond of one night stands. He didn’t like the lack of actual intimacy; the intimacy that leads to cuddling or waking up with that person beside him. None of his friends quite understood that, but he was never one to correct them. His personal life was his and his alone.

Answering to only a select number of his closer friends, he began to scroll through the random things on his phone. He wasn’t one for social media, and the puzzle games he had on his phone were far too easy, yet he couldn’t find the will to actually delete the apps. Maybe he could continue Badlands? That app proved to be a bit of a challenge. But, if he became too invested in it, he’d forget about his assignment at hand.

Riku scanned the environment once more, noticing that the men and women at the club had switched places – the women were pressed against the stage in an attempt to even so slightly touch the man walking the catwalk. The men went and got more drinks, went to the bathroom, or simply sat away from the catwalk and talked, avoiding looking at the male stripper. Riku was here by himself, but at least he had his phone to keep him occupied.

Turning his eyes back down to the lit up screen, he began scrolling through his Facebook. He never posted anything or made a comment, but he liked being informed about his family’s whereabouts. News about his brother having a baby (when the hell did that happen?), his cousin getting a new phone (no surprise there), a different brother having problems keeping a girlfriend steady (it’s his fault for being a man whore) – his family really didn’t change much either. _Guess being the same runs in the family,_ he thought.

His ears being unable to tune out the loud, thumping music, felt great reprieve when the music was cut off. The women in the front aww’ed in dismay as the man on the catwalk went backstage, but quieted down to listen to an enthusiastic announcer talk. Riku had no choice but to listen, and his boredom was quick to draw his eyes up to watch.

“Settle down, ladies!” The somewhat chubby man waved his arms in the air to signal for them to shush, “Thunder will be back out later, but I know you’re all here for the event of the night, right?” The man grinned as the ladies, and a few men, clapped and whistled in delight.

“Well, it’s a good thing you all waited!” He talked louder to get his voice heard over the clapping, “Give a warm welcome to The Little Mermaid and Sexy Siren!”

Riku rolled his eyes and turned his attention back down to his phone once he saw the curtain begin to move, signaling the dancers coming out from the back. He didn’t need to look at the dancers. He went to a strip club once for “enjoyment” and he never wanted to go back. Of course, he was aware that strippers usually joined the profession for personal reasons, but he never liked the way people flaunted their body in front of others.

Perhaps he was a prude in that sense.

Trying to focus back on his phone, his ears picked up the song _Give It to Me_ but it was the karaoke version. Instead of the artist’s voice coming through the speakers, it was the voices of the dancers. First, a woman, who made her voice seductive yet slightly high pitched. Riku didn’t mind the sound of her voice, but he found it odd the dancers were actually singing.

As she sang, Riku was able to keep his attention on his phone as he scrolled through his apps and music mindlessly. It was up until the girl had finished the chorus that his attention was snapped entirely to the speakers. The voice that filtered through was… gorgeous. Boy-ish sounding, yet talented - enticing. His voice was smooth and sweet, full of seduction and somehow joy at the same time. Riku froze in his seat, stopped what he was doing on his phone, and listened to the voice that was so mesmerizing.

_“Could you speak up and stop mu-mumbling, I don’t think you came in clear_

_When you’re sittin’ on the top, it’s hard to hear you from way up here,”_

Riku’s aqua eyes were hesitant to turn their gaze to the man who belonged to the beautiful voice, because he knew that he had to keep his focus on the job at hand. Besides, something like this, where he’d been attracted to a mere _voice_ was something that had never happened -  hell, being so attracted to _anyone_ like _this_ was foreign to him.

_“I saw you tryin’ to act cute on TV, just let me clear the air_

_We missed you on the charts last week, damn, that’s right you weren’t there,”_

Riku was not the type to just fall for anything that moved, but that voice was beginning to gnaw at his senses.

Going against his better judgment, he tilted his head and his eyes landed on the most alluring and drop dead gorgeous man he had ever seen. Messy, chocolate brown spikes going in every which way on his head, tanned skin that remained free of any form of blemish, and the seductive hip movements that came with the music – Riku was transfixed.

_“If se-sexy never left, then why’s everybody on my shi-it-it_

_Don’t hate on me just because you didn’t come up with it,”_

The silver haired man slowly stood and began making his way to the edge of the crowd after he watched the man dance for a minute. His mouth was agape with awe as the brunette loosened a tie and tossed it towards the curtain, before he began moving his hips in a circular motion, plump ass jutting out for the women and men to see.

Riku didn’t dare move closer to the stage. He didn’t want to waste money here. Besides, how would he get the brunette to notice him if he was just here to give him money?

_“So if you see us in the club, go on and walk the other way_

_Cause our run will never be over, not at least until we say,”_

Plush lips parted to sing the next verse, and Riku was captivated more. His eyes watched each of the brunette’s muscles contract or relax as he walked a little ways down the catwalk, ripping off the thin material that covered his lower half, the pant-like material falling behind him. The brunette slid down onto his knees, hips out towards the women that were closest to the stage, one hand going to rest behind his neck while the other trailed down his stomach. Money was almost instantly thrown at him or shoved into the tight booty shorts he was wearing.

The redhead behind the brunette sauntered up to him and put a hand on his shoulder causing the brunette to stand and turn to her as they both began singing.

“If you see us in the club, we’ll be actin’ real nice

If you see us on the floor, you’ll be watchin’ all night,”

Riku’s eyes stayed glued to the brunette as he moved his hips seductively. Riku couldn’t pry his eyes off the brunette to watch the redhead beside  him pull her bra off in one smooth gesture. What he did notice though, was the brunette briefly looking around the room, in which their eyes locked for a second, and Riku could feel his breath catch.

The deepest blue eyes he had ever seen were staring into his. He couldn’t see _everything_ that the man’s eyes held, but he could see the way his beautiful eyes seemed to pop with the tan skin that lay so close to it.

_“We ain’t here to hurt nobody_

_So give it to me, give it to me, give it to me,”_

Riku could feel the disappointment in his chest, knowing the song was nearing its end, but he felt more inclined to stick around to talk to this brunette – if he were even allowed to. He didn’t care. He knew he had to talk to him. Those perfect lips moving in time with the redhead beside him, his muscles moving fluidly as he danced, sweat dripping down his curves from the heat of the lights, those eyes – Riku just couldn’t pass someone like this up. Even if he was bombarded with ”date me” daily.

_”Wanna see you work your body_

_So give it to me, give it to me, give it to me,”_

The music ended and the crowd erupted in a chorus of cheers and whistles as the two dancers grinned. The grin that spread across the brunette’s face was enough to send Riku’s heart fluttering. As soon as they disappeared behind the curtain, Riku scoffed and shook his head, thinking, _How different of me. Since when did I start falling for_ voices _?_

The announcer came back out, jolly as ever to bring out the next few performers, and Riku was discouraged after he heard that Sexy Siren wasn’t going to come back out. He must’ve come too late to see the brunette perform earlier.

Riku trudged back over to the seat he had chosen and sat back down. The club wasn’t closing for another two hours, and Riku wasn’t supposed to leave until he collected enough information about the club anyway. Not that there was much to collect – unless his captain wanted a detailed report of a stripper that was extremely attractive.

That gave Riku an excuse to stay later than necessary, though, as the drunkards and giggling groups of women made their way out of the club and the last dancers left to remove their make-up and revealing clothes. Riku stayed where he was, hoping to catch the brunette as he left the club. He watched as a different  brunette, who had a scar across his face, stacked chairs, and noticed one of the other strippers come out from the back to help – a blonde haired man that he hadn’t watched dance. Riku sighed through his nose, thinking the brunette he was looking for had gone out through the back a long time ago to go home. He was about to finish his beer off and go home himself when he saw the spikes come out from the back of the club.

The small brunette was wearing normal clothes now: a baggy black hoodie, a pair of dark blue jeans, and yellow shoes that threw the outfit off with the random splash of color. Riku stayed seated in the booth he was at, listening for the brunette’s normal voice as he started helping out the two stacking chairs.

“One of those girls looked about ready to jump on the stage,” The brunette laughed – _that gorgeous laugh_ , Riku thought – as he pointed at the blonde standing a few feet away from him, “How do you even deal with all that? If I had someone look at me like that I’d freak out.”

Cloud shrugged, “You get used to it. And, if you’re not noticing the looks women _and_ men are giving you, you’re more oblivious than I thought,” Cloud teased, a smirk on his lips.

“Hey, I don’t notice them because they aren’t doing that to me!” The brunette countered, a small pout on his lips. “But, they’re all googly eyes for you.”

“Sora, you’re hopeless,” The older brunette chimed in, chuckling when Sora gave them both an angry glare.

“Maybe I’m too involved with how I dance to worry about how people stare at me. It’s not like I have people throwing money at me for my _amazing_ dance skills or anything.” Sora stated, putting his hands on his hips after he put up the last chair.

Riku was about to keep listening, when his shoulder was tapped by the brunette with a scar across his face. “It’s closing time. Gotta get going.”

Riku softly sighed and stood, having been  gathering up the courage to talk to this Sora. “Alright, I’ll get going. After I talk to, uh, that guy,” Riku quietly told the owner, pointing at the exotic dancer before he walked over to him, not giving the man a chance to stop him. “Hey.” _Smooth, Riku. Real original_ , he thought, already biting his tongue.

Sora turned his gaze up to meet Riku’s, glancing at Cloud and the other brunette before he spoke, “Uh, hey. Do I know you?” He cautiously asked, checking the distance between them as casual as he could.

“Oh, no. I’m Riku, I, uh, saw you earlier. Just wanted to say you have a beautiful singing voice,” Riku quietly said, a hand going to rub the back of his neck. He usually wasn’t this nervous, especially around people he was trying to hit on, but the brunette in front of him drained his skills down to nothing. It was like he had this ability to spot flirting and tear it down without even meaning to.

Sora’s mouth made an “o” shape, nodding slowly, “I see. Well, sorry, but I don’t give out my number or go on dates with people who come to see me dance.” Sora responded easily, as if he’d spoke that same line a million times. That was a crushing blow to Riku’s confidence he had mustered; _He probably gets approached all the time. I must look like a fucking creep_ , he thought, trying to remain neutral.

“This is actually my first time here. I know you probably get a lot of people talking to you after shows, but I-“ Riku began, but was cut off by the blonde haired man now standing beside Sora, a step closer to Riku in a protective stance.

“Well, Riku, I think it’s time you leave.” Cloud sternly said, his arms crossed, “I don’t see a reason for you to stick around past closing time.”

Riku looked between the blonde and Sora, before waving his hands in the air in slight defense, “Hey, I wasn’t going to _try_ anything with him, I just wanted to-“

“Get to know him and hurt him? Yeah, that’s not going to be happening. Get out,” Cloud growled, a stern stare in place.

Riku went from his nervous phase to his rude state, “I wasn’t going to _hurt_ him. Why can’t someone get to know another person? Just because he’s an exotic dancer doesn’t mean I can’t _talk_ to him.”

“When you’re talking to him after a show, it’s very likely you’re here because of his body.” Cloud retorted, snarky tone in place, “It’s past closing time. You need to leave anyway.”

Riku tsked, “ _Fine._ ” He snapped, turning to walk towards the doors. He pushed them open with a bitter sigh, heart still thumping.

He could’ve continued to fight the blonde haired man on staying longer, but he knew better than to piss off the place where he could see the young brunette. He sighed and reluctantly left, but as he was exiting the doors, he distinctly heard a, “Cloud, I could’ve handled that myself!” followed by a quick, “No, you couldn’t,” causing a small chuckle to pass his lips.

Riku wasn’t sure about who the brunette was, or anything of the sorts, but he was positive on the fact that he wanted to know more about him. He couldn’t call the feeling in his chest love, hell, he knew it wasn’t – he didn’t believe in love at first sight – but that didn’t mean he wasn’t intrigued by the man. While his feelings earlier may have been brash and misjudged easily, he knew now that it was because he was drawn in by the man’s voice, and he wanted nothing more than to know everything about him.

\---

After that encounter he had at the strip club, Riku had gone home, taken his dog (affectionately named Goofy) out for a walk, slept, and returned to work the next day with no news about the club's possible affiliation with any gangs. Quite frankly, he thought the club had no involvement with gangs – it _seemed_ normal. His Chief, Mickey, seemed disappointed, but satisfied with the report. Riku made his way back to his desk after, not needing to go on patrol for another hour, leaving him to work on things that he hadn’t finished.

Riku sighed through his nose, idly typing a report for the umpteenth time since he became a policeman whilst he thought of other things. Nothing very exciting happened around the precinct the way they dramatize it on television or movies. There was quiet chatter, but mostly the noise of fingers against keys moving quickly to avoid a late turn in time  was the only thing that could be heard. Every now and then, a drug addict or an angry citizen would come in screaming about one thing or another, but other than that, things usually stayed rather silent.

Well, maybe to Riku, that is.

Riku knew his coworkers well enough to know they had his back out on the job, but other than that, he never participated in their activities outside of work. The only person he _did_ spend any time with in public, out of the uniform and overbearing policies, was his partner Merida. She was very much on the wild side, and Riku didn’t think he’d actually be able to handle _training_ the younger officer, but he managed and had become very close to Merida over the years of working so closely together.

In fact, he spent much more time with her than his own family. But that was for personal preference over any hard feelings that may have been in the family.

Riku ran his fingers through his hair slowly, massaging his scalp as he tied the silver locks up into a ponytail. As he closed his eyes, his memory went back to the dancer he had been so fortunate to meet last night. He couldn’t seem to get the dazzling grin out of his mind, those bright blue eyes… he was entranced, to say the least. Every time he blinked, he saw that tan face, those out of control spikes, and he felt his heart begin to race again.

God, when did he turn into such a fucking _sap_?

Riku was jolted out of his thoughts at a distinct slap against his back, causing him to flinch and snap his eyes open, “The fu-“

“Whoa, there! I see you’ve been doing nothin’ productive all mornin’, have ya?” A thick, Scottish accent teased affectionately. Riku turned in his chair, rolling his eyes at his partner.

“I’ve been doing plenty, you just caught me right as I happened to be doing nothing,” Riku explained, leaning back in his chair as he looked up at the redhead. “At least I’m not the one deciding to go on a million “doughnut” runs just to get out of the precinct for a bit.”

Merida put her hands on her hips, a pout following, “I do not lie to leave! Well,” Merida thought it over before she shrugged and smiled, “Maybe sometimes. At least I’m out in case something happens!” Merida said triumphantly, posture in a heroic pose.

Riku chuckled lightly as he turned his chair back towards his computer, skimming over the work he had already finished, “If you want to see it that way I won’t stop you. Just know, you’ll get in trouble someday for pulling an everyday stunt like this.” Riku pointed out, picking up where he left off easily.

“Only if a certain ponytailed guy tells the Chief.” Merida tugged on Riku’s ponytail, laughing when he reached a hand back to swat her hand away. “Hurry up and finish your report – I want to get back out there and patrol, get some action!”

Riku waved her off, letting her wander away before he continued to work the remainder of the time he had in the precinct. He didn’t let his thoughts stray again, knowing that he’d have to deal with Merida snapping him out of his thoughts again. He didn’t need the woman asking questions about what had him so wrapped up – because he knew he’d be getting them anyway. Merida may be crazy and seemingly untamable, but she was smart, and Riku gave her credit for that every chance he got.

Riku shut his computer down as he stood, stretching his misused limbs while he walked out of the police building, heading to the patrol car that was Merida’s and his. He slid into the passenger side, letting the fiery redhead drive for the day.

As soon as the doors were shut, questions were fired at Riku. “So, what had you so in thought this mornin’?” Merida asked with a sly smile on her face, “Did you meet someone? Maybe had a pleasant night with your family?” Merida offered, hoping to coax a response from the silver haired man.

Riku scoffed and shook his head, “What makes you think anything was on my mind? I was thinking about work – it’s a very thought consuming job.” Riku lied, his eyes forward as Merida drove out of the parking lot, heading to their usual patrol area.

“No, no, your face was not ‘I’m thinking about work,’ your face was, ‘I’m thinking about _someone_ ,’ and I feel I have a right to know who that someone is.” Merida pointed out frankly, a finger wagging at Riku’s face.

Riku sighed through his nose, staying silent. It wasn’t that he was ashamed that he had felt _some_ thing for the brunette he saw last night, it was more… he’d rather keep it to himself. At least for now. Especially when he didn’t know the dancer personally yet. And, besides, the last thing he needed was a nosy Merida going down to the club and demanding to see Sora. No, no. Riku would much rather do this on his own terms and time – even if it took forever.

 _And_ , he thought, _I could just be attracted to him. I don’t know him. I may not even like him once I get to know him._

“Riku! I was talkin’ to you!” Merida half-growled, flicking Riku’s nose indignantly. “Tell me who it is you’re thinking about! You got that look on your face again.”

Riku rubbed the tip of his nose slowly, contemplating actually telling his friend, before he buckled, “I did meet someone. Sort of.” Riku gave the shortest answer he could, even though he knew it wouldn’t suffice.

“Oh, good! And who are they? What’s their name?” Merida asked quickly, the words tumbling out of her mouth fast. “Where’d you meet them? How’d you meet them? Are they friendly? You better introduce me! As your best friend, I have to meet them and make sure they’re good for you. Otherwise, they’ll get a little ass-kicking from me. How old are they? What do they look like? Are-“

Riku’s head swarmed with answers and that ensued with complete confusion, leading him to shout, “Merida!” He silenced his partner, rubbing the bridge of his nose before he breathed out, “How am I supposed to answer any questions when you’re asking me them at the speed of light?” Riku questioned, tacking on, “I… don’t know that much about them, actually. All I really know is where they work and their name and their looks. Nothing else.”

Merida nodded, “Okay, then, spill the beans! Tell me everything!”

Riku glanced at the redhead, his eyes shut as Sora’s face popped up in his mind. “Can’t we just continue working? I’d rather get through the day without missing anything than talk about my romantic life.” Riku hoped Merida would go for the offer. He really, _really,_ wanted to keep Sora to himself – for now, while things were still… weird.

Merida huffed and rolled her eyes, “Fine, fine. I’ll drop it until we clock out.” Merida stated, just as they pulled in to their usual coffee place. It was routine to come here in the morning before they headed out for patrol. Riku told Merida to stay in the car while he went to go get them their usual coffee’s, which gave him a chance to collect his thoughts.

Riku knew that he was being much too brash and jumped the gun with a lot of his feelings, and Merida wasn’t helping. Right now, Riku needed to focus on work, because he knew he’d have to deal with Merida one way or another at the end of the day.

~~~

Just as Riku had suspected, Merida was on his case once more as soon as the day was up. He tried his best to ignore the pestering woman, but she knew he’d crack after bothering him enough and Merida was well aware of that. “Merida, please, I’d rather keep it-“

“To yourself, like a little lame-o!” Merida finished, walking out with Riku to their cars, “I get you like to keep things to yourself, Riku, but it’s not like I’m gonna do anything to whoever this person is.”

Riku shook his head, fishing his keys out of his pocket as they approached his car, “I don’t think you will, but that doesn’t mean I want to tell you. I just met him last night, that’s all I really want to say.”

Merida seemed just about ready to take that answer and leave it, but her eyes widened with sudden realization, “You had an assignment to go to that strip club last night,” Merida slowly spoke, before she hurriedly whispered, “You like a stripper, don’t you?”

Riku’s face went from neutral to panicked, his head shaking furiously. “No, no! Not at all – what makes you think I’d like a stripper? You know I’d never go for someone like that.” Riku coughed nervously, rubbing the back of his neck. “He’s just a guy I met, that’s all I’m saying.”

Merida scoffed, standing closer to the silver haired man to stop him from escaping into his vehicle. “I don’t see anythin’ wrong in liking an exotic dancer! Some of my best friends are dancers. Who is he? If you don’t tell me I’ll be forced to go there myself and pick one out.”

Riku bit his lip nervously. “He’s… the brunette one. Tan skin. Gorgeous blue eyes and a dazzling smile.” Riku slowly, softly said, his shoes scuffing the ground out of embarrassment. “Please, Merida, I really need you to not go there and bother him.” Riku pleaded, hoping his friend would refrain from going down to the club.

“You really think I would do that to you?” Merida asked, offended expression in place, “I can tell you like the guy enough, I won’t go and bother him.” Merida stated firmly, leaving Riku with a sigh of relief.

“Good… and, I’d really appreciate not talking about him again. He’s… just a dancer.” Riku grabbed Merida’s shoulders and moved her to the side, opening his door to slide in. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Merida.” Riku bid a brief farewell to his coworker, waiting for her to get out of the way of his vehicle before he drove home.

The ride home was quiet, except for the soft noise of the radio at a low volume giving the car some life. He never listened to music loudly, unless they were in headphones and he was using it as a way to get out of social interactions that were thrust on him – like at family gatherings. Man, did Riku hate seeing all the silver haired weirdo’s in one place at the same time.

Riku scoffed at his own memory of a recent family gathering, one that was cut short due to a fight that had broken out amongst Riku and his three siblings over _something_ trivial. The fight was so miniscule Riku couldn’t even remember what had caused it, but their father was going to have no part of it and kicked them out promptly.

Riku rolled his eyes to himself as he pulled up to his small house. He got out of the car slowly as he saw the black and tan dog in his window, his floppy ears perked up as Riku strolled to the front door. The man let out a chuckle as he watched, and heard, the dog scramble from the window to the door as Riku stepped in, “Hey, Goofy. Have a nice, relaxing day without me?” Riku asked, patting the dog’s head.

Goofy used to be a part of the K9 Unit at Riku’s station, but he was retired when he was injured during a drug bust. They were going to give him to the Humane Society, but Riku had seen the black dog around the precinct before and had grown attached to him. Riku then adopted Goofy, and the dog was now a few years older – calmer and more relaxed but still a dog nonetheless.

“Yeah, I bet you had a wonderful time sleeping. Jeez, what I’d give to sleep as much as you do.” Riku joked with the animal, chuckling to himself as he shut and locked the door, beginning his usual routine of changing into his home wear. He made sure his gun was tucked safely away in the safe in his room, knowing Goofy would alert him of a break in, before he wandered out to the kitchen, tiredly making himself dinner.

As Riku cooked, he wondered if he should head down to the club again tonight, but he quickly chose against it. For one, he didn’t want to seem like some creepy stalker, and two, he wasn’t too fond of going out after work. He was always much too exhausted to do something like that.  Perhaps he’d go tomorrow – if he had enough energy to do so.

Although, he knew he wouldn’t get anywhere. That made him wonder _how_ exactly he was supposed to make any progress with the tan dancer. Maybe he should just forget about this silly infatuation and continue on with his life, hoping Mickey didn’t send him on another scout out of the place?

That was much too easy, though. Riku never liked the easy route. It was always a “forge your own path” type of thing with him. Going the hard way wasn’t fun, either, so picking the middle route was something he’d much rather do.

So: take the easy way of forgetting about his one day crush; take the hard way of spending night after night at the club; or take the middle way – spending a couple nights a week there to stay late and try to talk to the brunette, even if the blonde from the previous night kicked him out each time. That seemed much more interesting, and besides, it would give Riku the necessary time he’d most likely need to truly mull over his feelings and see if he wished to pursue the man he had seen.

Riku tasted the soup he had made, adding a pinch of salt as he transferred it from pot to bowl. He scooped Goofy more of his dog food while he settled down in his chair in the living room. He turned the TV on, but he kept it more as background noise. In all honesty, Riku was getting bored of being this alone. While he had Goofy, the dog wasn’t a very good conversationalist, and Merida was someone Riku would rather see at work and occasionally out someplace than spend every day with.

Riku had never been one for relationships, but as of late – before he had met the blue eyed beauty the previous night – Riku had been getting a nagging feeling of loneliness. It wasn’t natural for him, but he couldn’t deny the feeling. While he always preferred to be alone, and would be fine living the rest of his life that way, he wanted someone else here, if even for a few weeks before a break up.

Perhaps this dancer could be someone he could rely on for that loneliness to leave? He doubted it, but a flower of hope budded in his chest.

\---

Several weeks had passed since their first encounter; Riku was being personally escorted out at the end of every night Riku had shown up by Cloud, due to Riku’s persistence on trying to talk to Sora. Riku was tempted to fight the blonde man, but he knew better, and he could see Sora scurrying up to the upper floor of the strip club as soon as the club doors were locked on some nights. It bothered him to no end, but Riku came in after work every couple days, as he decided weeks prior, to watch the brunette dance and sing, and it only made Riku want to talk to him more.

He was successful in slipping a few sentences of conversation into the brunette on some nights, when the blonde dancer seemed preoccupied backstage and the owner of the club was nowhere in sight, but other than that, there had been little to no contact. Those quick minute conversations were enough to get Sora to smile, at least, and that felt like a victory enough to Riku – if he can get the brunette to smile because of _him_ , he had to be doing something right. The short time that were the talks never gave Riku a chance to ask more in depth questions to the brunette other than “How was your day?” and that was more than a disappointment.

The first week that Riku had shown up to the club, Riku was still discussing his feelings internally. Merida had wanted to give calm advice, and Riku let her, and it led to Riku figuring out his feelings towards the dancer. Sexual attraction was a small part of what he was feeling, since he saw sex as more of bonus to relationships than a requirement, and Merida had helped the silver haired man conclude that he wished to know more for one particular reason: genuine interest.

Riku knew little to nothing about the brunette, but Riku was intrigued and captivated by the young man’s external beauty and voice from the day he “met” him. He wouldn’t call it love, he would say it was a more advanced crush. No lust or want was overtaking him, driving him mad beyond belief was there. Only the deep seated feeling of wanting to know more - because Riku could feel the brunette had a story to tell, and that Sora was worth whatever costs it took to get to know him. And, Riku got this vibe from Sora – almost as if the tan dancer gave off a pleasant emotion, making others around him feel happy, and Riku longed for something – some _one_ – like that in his life. Of course, the people here to see him strip couldn’t possibly feel the way Riku did. Riku cared more about personality, anyway. He just hoped he would get the chance to talk to the brunette soon.

Over the course of the few weeks, Riku began observing tiny details about Sora’s body as he danced, having been approaching the stage more often but staying amidst the crowd or on the outskirts instead of trying to get to the front. He was able to see freckles that were dusted over his cheeks and shoulders, hard to see because of his tan skin; he noticed that if Sora was sweating enough by the ends of his routines that dark circles were under his eyes, showing pure signs of stress and tiredness; and on one particular night, Riku noticed that the make-up for all the dancers had been hurriedly put on, and Riku could see the thin white scars marking up Sora’s thighs as he danced. Those lines spoke so much yet offered much more mystery. It made Riku wonder why such a happy seeming man would feel the need to harm himself.

Riku had no chances to ask the brunette. As much as he wanted to find him _outside_ of the club, he wasn’t about to abuse his power as a police officer to figure out where the brunette would go. Riku would never want to build a relationship off of something like that.

This particular night, however, when Riku was second guessing actually showing up at the club but had a gut feeling that tonight was a good night to go down to The Dusks and Shadows, things went _much_ differently. The night started off the same as any does – the dancers come out and the crowd goes wild until they leave, and the announcer comes back to bring the next dancer, or dancers. The smell of alcohol stayed lingering in the air, cigarette smoke drifted up into the vents, and things were simple; normal.

That was, until Sora came on.

Sora made a grand entrance onto the stage, having gone solo that night. The usual grin was plastered on his face, his blue eyes wide, plush lips moving seductively as he sang, and Riku could feel the way the brunette kept looking at him. Directly at Riku; making eye contact and keeping it for multiple seconds. He could feel the other people in the crowd beginning to turn their head in an attempt to see what one of their favorite dancers kept looking at, and Riku did the same, though, when he turned back, he could see the small laugh that escaped the brunette’s lips before he began singing again. Riku couldn’t help feeling as if this dance was for him – or at least, directed towards him. Their inconsistent minute conversations seemed to have paid off in the long run.

Riku listened to every word the brunette sang, watching each muscle move fluidly, a tiny smile on his lips as he made frequent eye contact with Sora. Riku paid attention to the sweat that began to drip down Sora’s body slowly, droplets that collected and moved further down as he danced, or flung off onto the stage with each sudden movement of his slender body.

But, in the middle of the brunette’s routine, the music was cut off, leaving Sora to stop dancing awkwardly. The silence was quickly followed by multiple “What the hell’s?” and angry remarks towards the person in charge of the music, but they shut up when the owner of the club came up onto the stage in a hurry. Riku leaned slightly forward, watching the older brunette’s lips as he whispered into Sora’s ear, and Riku could feel his heart drop. He saw the way his dancer paled, his breath stopping for a second before he was running backstage, no doubt about to go get more clothes on.

Riku stood and left the club, heading out to his car. He had no idea why Sora would need to go there, but he was able to read “hospital” off Leon’s lips as he spoke to Sora. Riku knew full well that running to the hospital when he knew nothing about the man was crazy, and he’d seem like a stalker, but Riku couldn’t let Sora go alone – suffer alone. He didn’t care if he got a firm smack from the dancer, he wanted to be there for him. If Sora asked him to, he’d leave him alone forever, even if it hurt him.

Riku drove slowly to the hospital, taking his time, wanting to give the brunette time to get there before him. Riku wanted time to carefully think out his actions, anyway. But, by the time Riku arrived at the hospital, he had to assume that Sora was already there, most likely visiting or hearing about the condition of his family or friend. Riku slowly exited his vehicle, feeling apprehensive as he made his way into the large double doors, the smell of antiseptics and cleaners assaulting his nose. He didn’t know where to begin looking for the brunette, but he caught a glimpse of his agro spikes through the doors that led to the pediatric ward. Riku’s heart sank again, seeing that the brunette was hunched over, his head buried in his hands.

Riku took a deep breath and walked into the room, seeing only one other couple sitting far away from Sora, talking quietly amongst themselves. Riku could see Sora’s body shaking slightly, no doubt from the fear of whatever was going on, and Riku took a slow seat beside him.

Sora seemed to sense his presence, but had no idea who it was. Or, perhaps he mistook Riku for someone else, for the way he was talking seemed to be as if Sora was talking to someone close to him. “What the hell am I supposed to do? What if he doesn’t wake up this time? Those idiotic doctors told me he was getting _better_ , not worse. Why would he collapse?” Sora spoke softly, his head still resting in his hands.

Riku sat silently beside Sora, letting the brunette talk, his knowledge of what was going on being too little to try and comfort. “You’d think after months of chemo and a marrow transplant these episodes would stop happening, but…” Sora’s voice shook. “Here he is, _again,_ stuck in this damn hospital. He hates it so much, I know he does. He’s  only 14 and he has to deal with this bullshit. This constant fear of _when_ he’s going to collapse next, not _if_.” Sora bitterly spat, before he leaned back in the seat, his palms rubbing circles gently into his eye sockets. “I can’t imagine what he’s going through… I can only support him but I feel like that’s not enough… clearly it’s not, huh? He’s still fainting, still on this horrid rollercoaster of okay and not okay. This isn’t fair – none of it is, Aerith.” He whispered slowly, a frown creeping on his lips, tugging at Riku’s heart.

Riku waited for the man to finish speaking before he placed a hand gently on his shoulder, about to speak when an angry, “Why the hell are you here?” came from the entryway to the pediatric ward.

Sora and Riku both flinched, turning their heads to look at Cloud, who was standing with his arms crossed, scowl in place. “I _said,_ why the hell are you here?” Cloud repeated, after not receiving an immediate answer.

“Riku…?” Sora muttered, causing the silver haired man to look into those deep blue eyes. “How… long have you been here? I thought you were a friend of mine, I… Oh, crap…” Sora groaned, running his hands through his hair before he stood.

Cloud stepped closer to the pair, “No one’s going to answer me? Sora, why’s he here? You actually trust this creep to know about him?” Cloud questioned, shooting Riku glares every chance he got.

“I didn’t come here because he asked me to,” Riku butt in, also standing. “I saw him leaving the club alone, I thought-“

“That it’d be fun to stalk him to the hospital? Not home or anything, but a damn _hospital?”_ Cloud snapped, “You’re a class act fan. You probably came here just to get your move in without Leon or me here, hm? When he’s fucking vulnerable?”

Sora shook his head, “Cloud, if he had wanted to do that, he would’ve done it long before you got here. He just… listened.” Sora explained, his eyes wandering to Riku as he spoke. Riku had trouble reading Sora’s expression, but there was something about the confused look Sora gave him that made his heart feel tight.

“I don’t care if he was here just to listen, I guarantee that he was here to make a move. He probably figured you’d be vulnerable, especially if you were coming here for _someone_ , and he thought this was a perfect opportunity.” Cloud seethed, his stance still more than protective of the brunette standing in front of him.

“Look, I wasn’t here to ‘make a move.’ I’m not that sleazy and I’d never take advantage of someone because they’re at a hospital.” Riku defended himself, not about to break under Cloud’s threatening gaze. “Just because I don’t know him personally doesn’t mean I can’t want to help him.”

Cloud turned his whole body towards Riku, about to go off again when Sora grabbed the blonde’s arm tightly. “Stop it, Cloud. You’re causing a scene where there doesn’t need to be one.” Sora flatly spoke, silencing the older man, before he sighed gently. “I’m sorry. Please, I don’t care if you two want to rip each other’s throats out, I just don’t want to deal with fighting when I have a sick little brother. Okay? Riku wasn’t doing anything creepy to me, and… and I don’t see him trying to do anything creepy to me.”

Cloud made a quiet noise of defeat after he was silent for a few moments. “Fine. I’ll accept him – for tonight,” Cloud muttered, before he pointed a finger at Riku, “But any wrong movements and I’ll throw you out of this hospital myself.”

Riku nodded, “I can agree with that.”

Awkwardly, the three sat in the waiting room, mostly in silence. Sora sat in the middle, despite Cloud wanting to sit between the two as a “buffer,” and Sora continued to stare at the same tile in front of him. Riku leaned forward every now and then to check and make sure Sora was at least blinking, and he tried to find different topics of conversation that he could ask the brunette to try and take his mind off things. When nothing came to mind, he leaned back in his chair, letting out a long sigh.

Riku hadn’t expected things to turn out this way tonight – not at all. He had been trying to make a move for weeks now, but that was proving difficult with a certain blonde haired bodyguard always telling him to “Get the fuck out,” before he could even get close to Sora. That always disheartened Riku, and he was beginning to give up on ever actually being able to talk to Sora, ever get to know him. Riku would never admit it, but he was thankful that something had happened to get Sora out of the club and somewhere Riku could join. No words were passing, but he felt this would lead to more interaction.

Riku’s eyes darted over to the blonde that he could see over Sora’s back, and he caught yet another glare. Riku shook his head in slight annoyance, placing a hand on Sora’s back, rubbing it in a comforting manner. The corner of his lips went up just enough to offer the brunette solace when he turned his head to look at him, and Sora gave a curt smile back.

The man leaned towards the one sitting beside him, talking softly, “Are you okay? Be honest here.”

Sora licked his lips slowly, before he scoffed weakly, “I’m tired.” Sora whispered, rubbing his hands through his hair and down his neck.

Riku knew exactly what he meant. He didn’t offer words of advice or consolation, knowing that there’s nothing he could say to the man to cheer him up. Instead, he continued to rub slow, light circles into Sora’s upper back, giving what little comfort he could manage to Sora. Riku knew too well the feeling of “tired,” that feeling of the weight of the world on his shoulders, feeling like nothing was going right, feeling like every attempt was a failure. Riku hoped that he could be there for the man like Cloud and Leon were there for him.

Silence ensued once more, and the hours dragged out and seemed to go slower as the night went on. The couple that was in the room when Riku came in had long since left and no one else had showed up. Riku felt strange being in a hospital this late, when the building was quiet and there were no bustling nurses or phones ringing, only the soft click clacking of shoes going to check on sleeping patients.

As the hours reached the early morning, Leon showed up. He glanced at Riku but paid no attention to him, instead he talked to Cloud and Sora quietly. Shortly after Leon arrived, a doctor came out, looking as tired as the four of them did. Sora instantly stood and went over to the short, slate-haired man, and crossed his arms, listening to the doctor speak while nodding every now and then.

Cloud, Leon, and Riku all sat where they had chosen, watching the two interact. When Sora sighed a breath of relief, a thankful smile appearing on his pink lips, Riku could’ve sworn he felt himself feel more relaxed. It was nice after the hours of tension to see the brunette less bottled up, and he talked for a minute more with the doctor. Sora turned back to the three but spoke directly to Leon and Cloud.

“He’ll be fine. It was just an episode of sorts – he’ll be able to leave the hospital in a few days,” Sora explained with a tired smile. “You guys can all go home now. I’m going to go sleep in Roxas’s room.”

Cloud and Leon both stood, walking Sora a ways away from Riku as Sora gestured to them. Riku let out a sigh, his eyes rolling as he realized they were talking about something that more or less concerned him. He wasn’t about to butt in, but it was getting on his nerves. Then again, it was weird enough he had showed up at the hospital in the first place. So, he stayed where he was seated, tapping his fingers against the armrests of the chair, eyes focused on a tile on the floor.

Riku felt more and more awkward. In fact, as the night progressed, he realized how crazy he must seem. No wonder Cloud had always been so quick to protect Sora from him – Riku would’ve been freaked out if someone kept trying to talk to him, too, especially in the setting that they had met in. Not only had he tried relentlessly to talk to Sora when he showed up at the club, but he also _followed_ him to a hospital.

Was Riku losing it?

He scoffed silently at himself. Riku knew this wasn’t like him. He never gave anyone this much time and effort, and he was torn between not wanting to scare the brunette and wanting him too much to care. There was no ill intentions he had towards Sora, and he would never do that in the first place, but there was something about the brunette that piqued Riku’s interest.

There was a lot of Sora Riku had noticed, and from the stressed out bags under his eyes and white scars lining his thighs, Riku felt the need to protect him - or at least help the brunette with whatever was troubling him.

As Cloud and Leon stepped back from Sora, Riku looked up and caught gazes with the younger brunette. Sora softly said his farewells to the two older men, before he made his way over to Riku again. “So…” Sora began, sitting beside Riku once more. “You’re pretty weird to follow me here.” The brunette chuckled, a tiny smile on his lips.

Riku rubbed the back of his neck nervously, “Well, I just, um… I wanted to be there for you in case you needed someone. I didn’t think your boss and your co worker were close enough to you to show up as well…” Riku trailed off, his eyes averted to a dark green tile on the floor.

“Not many people would think that, especially for my occupation, but,” Sora shrugged, “they’re both real good people. I’m actually surprised you had the guts to come here.”

Riku sighed, his voice growing quieter, “I guess I’ve got a lot of guts… I really wanted to talk to you. I honestly don’t have any ill intentions towards you, Sora. If I did I would’ve done them by now.” Riku explained, his heart beginning to race. Riku had never felt so strongly towards another person, and he certainly never cared enough about anyone else to show up unannounced and uninvited.

Sora leaned forward to look at Riku’s face, a curious expression in place, “I can tell that. You had all the opportunity in the world to do something before Cloud came in.” Sora pointed out, leaning back once Riku turned his head further away from Sora. “If you have no ill intentions towards me, why are you here, exactly? How come you kept trying to talk to me?”

Riku fought off the blush in his cheeks that threatened to overcome him. “Your voice caught my attention, and… I have this feeling that you’d be someone worth knowing. It’s not like you’re half bad to look at anyway.”

Sora laughed at that, making Riku smile, “Alright, alright. So, you’re not a creep – you’re just a guy who thinks I look nice?” Sora teased, “I don’t see why I _shouldn’t_ give you a chance. When I return to work in a few days, you can stay late and we can actually talk. For now, I need to go see my brother.”

Riku nodded instantly, his head turned now to look at Sora in the eye. He couldn’t believe this – his abrupt decision to follow the brunette to the hospital had actually paid off. At least he was getting a chance. Even if it led to nothing special, only friendship, he’d be fine with that. That doesn’t mean he wouldn’t _try_ to make things more special. “That sounds wonderful. I appreciate that, Sora. I can already tell you’re much different than most people. I expected a smack for coming here.”

“I had every right to, but, you didn’t do anything wrong,” Sora stood, causing Riku to stand, the silver haired man taking a respectful step back to give Sora space. “I’ll see you in a few days, then. I expect you to have good topics of conversation!” Sora smiled as he gave Riku a friendly wave, turning to walk through the double doors that led to the patients rooms.

“I’ll make sure to have topics,” Riku said, giving the brunette a small wave back, his heart still beating a million miles an hour. As that gorgeous grin was directed at him, he could’ve sworn he felt his heart swell. Once Sora was down the hall meant for family and staff only, Riku turned and made his way out to his car, knowing that the progress he had made with Sora was more than he could’ve hoped for.

The first thing Riku did when he slid into his car was let out a sigh of relief. For things to go so smoothly - somewhat - with the brunette was something he wasn’t expecting. He thought he’d get the cops called on him, actually, or even beat up when he saw the tall blonde walk in. Even with the lip-lashing Cloud had briefly given to him and the nasty glares he received, he felt like it was a successful day. Now, all he had to do was wait for Sora to return to work - which, he assumed, Sora was taking time off to be with his brother.

With their plans set for a few days from now, Riku finally started his car and drove home, the feeling of success not leaving him for a second. Even as he lie down to sleep that night, he found himself overcome by thoughts of the possibilities of their friendship - but, he couldn’t get ahead of himself, get his hopes up. He knew better than to do that.

 _Play it cool. I want this to work_ , he told himself just before he dozed off, pleasant dreams filling his mind.

\---

After his conversation with the doctor, Sora was somewhat relieved. The collapse Roxas had had only been a small case of his cancer acting up – or something like that. Sora had been too grateful for Roxas still being _alive_ to actually listen to the diagnosis. The doctor told him that only one person would be allowed to visit Roxas tonight, and only direct family. Sora gave a brief nod and thanked the doctor one last time before he turned to the three currently sitting in the chairs, all staring at him, waiting patiently for the news to be delivered.

Sora glanced at Riku, his heart telling him to keep his mouth shut about Roxas – what did Riku need to know about the blonde, anyway? – but he gave a brief relay of information directed more at Cloud and Leon. He shuffled on his feet for a moment and gestured to Cloud and Leon to follow him away from Riku. Once his two “parents” had stood and made their way to him, Sora began quietly talking.

“He’ll be fine. Just needs to spend a day or two here and he’ll be back home.” Sora explained again, his heart suddenly feeling heavy as he realized he had said things like that a lot over the past eight months. “The doc said only one person can visit tonight, and I don’t expect you two to wait out here until morning. I promise you two can come back tomorrow to see him.”

Leon put a hand on Sora’s shoulder, looking into the younger brunette’s eyes deeply, “I’m glad he’s okay, but are you?” Leon questioned, that being his thing whenever something happened to Roxas. It gave Sora a good sense of comfort, being asked if he was alright. He was usually too preoccupied with thoughts of Roxas to actually care about how _he_ was doing.

“I’m fine, just a bit tired. I’ll sleep in the hospital chair, though.” Sora chuckled softly, rubbing the back of his neck. “I’m just happy he’s still breathing.”

Cloud nodded once, “As long as he’s alive.” Cloud put in, ruffling Sora’s hair affectionately in an attempt to bring a smile to his lips. “You better make sure you-“

“I never asked – why is Riku here?” Leon cut off, his eyes having wandered to the silver haired man currently staring blankly at a tile on the ground. “And why didn’t _someone_ make him leave?” Leon turned his gaze to the blonde beside him, looking disappointed.

“I tried to make him leave, Leon,” Cloud sighed through his nose, “But, Sora insisted that he be allowed to stay. Since he didn’t do anything ‘wrong.’ I still don’t think he should be here.”

Sora shrugged, rubbing his upper arm as a yawn passed his lips, “Well, he could’ve tried something before you got here, Cloud, but he didn’t. I’m not saying I’m gonna marry the guy but that doesn’t mean I can’t give him the time of day. He’s not like the other people that try to talk to me at the club – he barely even _drinks_.”

“That doesn’t mean he’s not dangerous.” Leon pointed out, pulling his hand off Sora’s shoulder, “Just make sure he doesn’t hang around long. You don’t want him getting any ideas.”

Sora nodded and turned his head slightly to glance at the man, and he felt a twinge of pain. The way Riku was staring at the ground was the way Sora felt every time he was at this hospital – like nothing else in this world mattered. Of course, he wondered why Riku looked that way, but figured that might just be his face. “I know, I know, but I really don’t think he’ll do anything harmful.”

“Whatever you say, Sora.” Leon sighed through his nose, before he turned his head to Cloud. “We should get going. Sora should be with Roxas.” At Cloud’s nod, both the older men gave Sora a brief hug, leaving with a warning stare towards Riku. Leon added before he left that Sora had a few days off, as usual, to take care of Roxas.

Sora shook his head slightly at the behavior of the two men, and he made his way over to Riku again. They had a short conversation, in which Sora made a last minute decision to let Riku have at least _one_ chance. He hadn’t even been thinking about giving Riku a chance, but when he sat down to talk to him – without Cloud or Leon there – it felt right for Sora to do so. When they parted ways, Sora felt a bit lighter, feeling he had done the right thing.

As the brunette made his way down the familiar hallways of the hospital towards Roxas’s room, Sora couldn’t help but sigh. While he had just been feeling good, he couldn’t help but feel… bad. Perhaps it was because he was in the hospital, _again,_ making sure his brother was okay. Maybe it was due to the fact that the hospital bills coming in were piling up fast, and Sora was starting to drown in debt.

Sora bit his lip, running a hand through his spikes as he stopped outside Roxas’s room. Right now, those things shouldn’t matter – not being in the hospital, not the debt. All that matters _right now,_ is that Roxas is okay, that’s he’s resting. Without another moment’s hesitation, he pushed into the room quietly, making sure he wouldn’t wake the sleeping blonde.

Blue eyes landed on the pale skin that moved rhythmically with each slow breath. Sora’s heart ached at the sight, hating the way Roxas looked so sick after each of his episodes. Roxas had been battling for months now, with extensive chemo and plenty of rest, and the leukemia either stayed the same or proceeded to get worse. For a while there, the cancer was ebbing, and it was even beginning to fade. But, it came back full force and with a vengeance, making Roxas weak enough to where Sora had to pull him out of school. Now, Roxas had independent study online, and he did the work when he felt well enough to do so.

Sora slowly made his way to Roxas’s bedside, holding the blonde’s hand as he leaned down to kiss his forehead. Sora smiled sadly, his lips forced into a smile. Man, did his heart feel like it was getting poked with a giant stick again. With his free hand, he cupped Roxas’s cheek, a thumb rubbing gently over Roxas’s cheekbone.

“I’m sorry, Roxas,” Sora whispered, licking his dry lips, “I really, really am. I wish it were me instead of you… I hate having to watch you be in so much pain.” Sora’s voice grew softer as he spoke, his heart twisting more and more with each passing word. Sora had always been an empathetic person, and he was very quick to relate to someone’s pain or try to help them through it. It was a part of who he was. But, with Roxas, things seemed to be a thousand times worse. This wasn’t just some stranger or a friend, it was the person he had been so excited to meet when he found out his mother was pregnant.

 _Why_ , he wondered, _why did it have to be him?_  Sora hadn’t found this fair at all. After everything they had been through, the things Roxas had seen - he’d never want his precious little brother to suffer this way, to suffer even more than before. Sora let out a tired sigh through his nose, his eyes shut as he pressed his forehead against Roxas’s.

Sora kissed Roxas’s head one last time after he opened his eyes before he settled down in the all too familiar and uncomfortable chairs beside Roxas’s bed. He kept his hand locked with Roxas’s, as he usually did when he had to spend the night. Exhaustion consumed his mind once he had gotten “comfortable” in the chair, his eyes drooping shut. He kept his gaze locked on Roxas until he couldn’t any longer, and he fell asleep with a whisper of, “Love you, Rox.”

Today had been too much of a rollercoaster to stay awake much longer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally an update! I had a lot of fun writing this chapter and I hope you guys enjoyed it :D Don't know when the next chapter will be up, but, things will get more in depth from here on out! Well, more in depth for our little pre-love birds...


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